1. When you first master a skill, it is never reproducible in front of your coach.
2. Conversely, when you try to show your coach a skill you're having trouble with, you do it perfectly.
3. The fewer people there are on the ice, the greater your chances of a collision.
4. If there is a puddle on the ice, you are almost certain to fall just there.

Any others? I'm sure there must be lots....

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Mrs Redboots
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I love my computer because my friends live in it!
Ice dancers have lovely big curves!

I agree!!!
I was having trouble with skills the other day, I always seem to put my foot down on the 3-turns in it, so I try a 3-turn with my coach just off the pattern, and I can do it! and then when I go and practice it, I still put my foot down!
Also, once I skated a morning session and there were about 40 people on the ice, but no collisions. Then in the afternoon, with about 6 people on, two people go crashing into each other!

1. If you skate great one day, the next day you will skate like crap.

1b. The next day will be your lesson day.

2. If you start feeling like you're finally pulling it all together & start thinking maybe you can really do this after all, you talented thing you, something will happen *soon* that will send you to the opposite extreme, wondering why you're putting yourself through this when it's all so hopeless anyway.

1. The coach will almost always spring your worst element when you least expect it.

1b. When you expect your coach to spring a bad lesson day, s/he will almost always ends up doing something else that day...

2. The one day that you take off your knee/hip pads is the day that you end up falling on your knee/hip!!!

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Cheers,
jazzpants

11-04-2006: Shredded "Pre-Bronze FS for Life" Club Membership card!!!
Silver Moves is the next "Mission Impossible"
(Dare I try for Championship Adult Gold someday???)

Thank you for the support, you guys!!!

1. If getting technical elements like spins and jumps down in first session. LEAVE THE ICE RINK AND GO HOME.... I REPEAT DO NOT TRY TO RECREATE IT IN THE 2nd SESSION IT WILL GET WORSE, Especially by the 3rd and 4th..... Then you sorta start it out as you where learning

2. If you havent skated for a while... You usually have all your elements down pact without trying.

3. If you practiced every day... it sorta gets worse

If you fall over - everyone sees it
If you land a difficult jump - nobody sees it

The axel will always leave you the day of Final round at AN.

The coach sez we are going to work on figures on the next lesson, invariably I bring the freestyle skates.

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Keeping School Figures Alive!!

*If you're feeling a little hungover your coach will want to work on sit spins
*Even if you're not in a lesson your coach will just happen to glance your way right at the moment that you stuff something up
*There is no way on earth that you can follow the tracings of the 'scribe' for Figures but you can bet that you get stuck in someone else's rut when you're doing your Field Moves
*That skirt that you wear over your leotard and tights to hide your butt will spend the whole of the session up above your waist exposing said butt to the entire rink (I didn't realise that till I was videoed)

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The best whisper is a click

Just when you get your program down pat and start skating clean runthroughs, the coach adds or changes something in the program with the argument of COP to persuade you!

You get to the rink, raring to go and either the ice stinks or the session is cancelled, or it's too crowded to do anything.

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Adult Nationals, 2009 "The Time of My Life"

When a friend, or family goes to the rink to watch you, you fall at every given oppourtunity.

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http://www.yourphotoalbums.co.uk

That one's certainly true. Daughter was in the rink panto last year and the only one in her little group number who had an axel to do. Did a perfect axel every time (6 times) EXCEPT the one where her dad and brother came to watch.

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'skating is not just a sport - it is an obsession'

1. As what happened to me yesterday in my lesson......you start to skate your programme to music and you find the biggest, deepest, widest hole in the ice just as you push into your camel-sit - and promptly go splat!

2. You think you time that entrance into your lutz-loop just right but just as you get into the corner, someone appears and you have to abort or perform a lousy two-footer....also happened to me yesterday.

Nicki

The day you wear a slick, shiny skating dress or a wrap skirt is the day your pairs partner wants to work on lifts.

* Right when you plan to do a good jump you toepick yourself flat on ice and spend the next month avec a physiotherapist

If you try too hard, you can't get the jump. You have to relax, then jump!

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"The only place where success comes before work is in a dictionary." -- Vidal Sasson

"Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway." -- Unknown

The later you are running increases the probability of running onto the ice with your guards still on your blades.

Thanks for the tip. My weakness exactly. - And yes I've done that 3 times now. I'm beginning to dislike my guards.

THAT ALWAYS HAPPENS.

I don't know what 'COP' is but I agree with the rest of it My coach ALWAYS changed and added things. I'd start off working hard to fit everything in, get more comfortable with the program, fit everything in and then she'd add even more stuff in so it was back to the beginning ....

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The best whisper is a click

If you try to impress your crush through your skating, you will fail. If you're lucky, they'll like you anyway.

If you wear layers for a cold rink, it's warm. If you dress light, it's cold.

One of myrinks isn't well insulated, so it sortof follows the outside temperature. It's been hot out recently (in the 90's) so it's been warm in the rink. However, it's hockey camp week so they crank the temp down as soon as they open. It starts out in the mid 50's, and is in the low 40's two sessions later.

COP is known as Code of Points, that will be introduced at USFS qualifying events this year for Novice and above!

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Adult Nationals, 2009 "The Time of My Life"

Rule 1. Your coach has eyes of an eagle. She will catch the smallest of mistakes.

Corallary to Rule 1. She will let the rest of the rink know. "I saw that!!"

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Keeping School Figures Alive!!

Corallary 2 to Rule 1. Despite popular beliefs, your coach DOES have eyes on the back of her head...

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Cheers,
jazzpants

11-04-2006: Shredded "Pre-Bronze FS for Life" Club Membership card!!!
Silver Moves is the next "Mission Impossible"
(Dare I try for Championship Adult Gold someday???)

Thank you for the support, you guys!!!