Rent an ice dancer on e-Bay

[tulip]

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rd=1&item=7100499543&ssPageName=STRK:MESE:IT

For 65,000 pounds, you can skate with James Warren. :?? 8O :cry:

[jp1andOnly]

Haha, that is the funniest thing I have ever heard. I could see if the person was some big name but I probably have higher dance qualifications than him...LOL

[dance__skater]

That is one of the funniest things I have ever seen on e-bay... no the funniest! That made me laugh but if someones that desperate to have a partner we better hope they can spend that much on him!!

[WeBeEducated]

He is joking, right? 8O
Then again, that is the way many girls get a partner-they "buy"him! Might as well be up front about it.

[Michigansk8er]

He is joking, right?

Oh, I certainly hope so.....................especially after his comment about meeting celebrities like the Queen and Charlie White. I'm still laughing! :lol:

[backspin]

Pretty arrogant, IMO. He thinks he's worth 120 grand, PLUS all skating expenses? Pretty bold. :x Bet he's a peach to partner with, or coach, for that matter....... :roll: :roll:

[fadedstardust]

I thought the funniest part was "he stands at a TOWERING 5'6". That's like...two inches taller than me, and I am not tall. I sure hope this is a joke. This is totally against Ebay policies, anyway, I'm sure it'll get taken down.

My question is...he's selling his services for 120 grand but...he says all his expenses come extra. So what ARE you buying with 120 grand, anyway? This guy doesn't even look like he's 16 years old. He should put his age down.

[Aussie Willy]

This must be a joke. It surely is one of the funniest things I have seen on eBay. Yeah like I am that desperate for a dance partner. If it is true the guy really has tickets on himself.

Just converting the currency, so if I wanted to buy him for 250,000 pounds, then that would convert to about $750,000 Australian dollars. I will never earn that much in a lifetime.

So what would he do if just casually at the rink someone came up and asked him to dance?

[dooobedooo]

Don't think I'd pay anything to partner James Warren (I'm too old, too tall and not ambitious enough), but in the days when ice dance was a popular recreational sport, you could pay 25 pence or 50 pence for a dance with an instructor during a rink dance interval. And even now, there are one or two rich American competitors out there with paid-for Russian ice dance partners ....

So, methinks, who would you really like to ice dance with, and how much would you pay for it ....

Sergei Ponamarenko, Zhulin, Evgeny Platov ... probably up to twenty pounds for a dance (if I was drunk, or the money was going to a deserving charity), but then again, I'd probably be dead after a couple of dances.

Evgeny Plushenko ... well, he's not an ice dancer, but he's tall and looks like he'd be good fun company, so maybe a tenner for a dance. He looks quite strong too, so by some miracle, we may be able to manage a lift or two.

Mickey Mouse ... seems like a confident skater, he's in all the shows ... perhaps a quid for a dance, and a few photos. 8-) :D

[skaternum]

Of course it's a joke. Just read through the text of his description -- it's hilarious! :lol:

[Impromptu]

Haha, that is the funniest thing I have ever heard. I could see if the person was some big name but I probably have higher dance qualifications than him...LOL

Well, it's pretty clearly a joke.

But in terms of talent, he's actually got decent credentials for a novice/junior level skater. In 2003, he and his then partner won the US Novice bronze medal in a pretty tough field. The couple of times I've seen him skate, I've liked what I saw.

[oldtimersk8s]

This is surely funny! I remember the days you would rent a partner on a club session. Then teaching or available male coaches, the senior men, and older(adult skaters) would be paid to dance the dances with the skaters. We would sign up on a sheet in advance to rent a partner for the lesson. I remember some skaters even arguing about the sign-ups on the sign -up sheet! And then give grand gifts after test sessions,too. Maybe he is bringing back the idea in a more lucrative manner. But, $120,000 is really silly. He must be really good! Even if he is short!;)

[ClevelandDancer]

Sergei Ponamarenko, Zhulin, Evgeny Platov ... probably up to twenty pounds for a dance (if I was drunk, or the money was going to a deserving charity), but then again, I'd probably be dead after a couple of dances.

Hey, I'd gladly pay $35 (my guess at the exchange rate) to any of these guys (or Dean, Tchernyshev) for a dance or two just to say I did it! They'd have to earn it, dragging my butt around the rink, and they'd have to pose for a couple pics of course! ;)

I'm pretty much in the too tall (same height)/too old (I could probably be his mom)/too heavy (still carrying pregnancy weight) category to throw $20 for a dance Warren's way. You know, a $20 a social dance charity event could be a good way for aspiring dance teams to earn some training money ...

I'd have to say this is a joke. It's kinda funny, but also a sad commentary on the state of finding male ice dance partners.

[Rogue]

I just want to know what he has against Mexico. It's a nice country. Is he persona non grata there for misbehaving on a previous trip?

[flippet]

That's hysterical. But then, he's a Manc (at least it appears that way), so that explains it. :lol:

[AshBugg44]

"James is generously offering his services to any skater searching for the perfect partner"

I hardly call someone asking that much money generous. ;)

Did anyone look up competitive records on this guy?

"weather it be coaching"

Gotta love the spelling error of whether. :)

"All of James's expenses are an additional cost that shall be your responsibility."

What so do I have to pay for his skates, clothes, etc. as well? Psht. I'm cheap!

I love this:


Item Specifics

Condition: Used

I looked up 2003 Nats results:
3. 4 3 2 Shannon Wingle Detroit SC 11.0
James Warren Detroit SC
http://usfsa.org/event_related_details.asp?ri=/content/events/200203/uschamp03/pics/harvpics/1-12-03/novdance-comp/pics-novcompdance.htm

[what?meworry?]

...This is surely funny!...But, $120,000 is really silly. He must be really good!...
http://www.xe.com/ucc/ might come in handy in the days to come. just noticed the exchange rate has changed. the starting bid is now down to 116,161.32 usd.
That's hysterical. But then, he's a Manc (at least it appears that way), so that explains it. :lol:
why? is there something funny in the water in manchester?
...in terms of talent, he's actually got decent credentials for a novice/junior level skater. In 2003, he and his then partner won the US Novice bronze medal in a pretty tough field. The couple of times I've seen him skate, I've liked what I saw.
on a serious note along with impromptu: i also saw him compete with wingle---very talented. i was disappointed to see him leave the usa system.

edited to add cross-link to the other thread where hillary says: "I'm looking for a male Junior Ice dancer" and a matchmaker comes to the rescue. http://www.skatingforums.com/showthread.php?t=14931

[robertp]

After the nationals with Wingle, Mr. Warren skated with a gal that paid for his services. He was paid quite handsomely from what I recall. He was a lower level champion in England from what I recall prior to his showing at the 2003 Nat'ls. I agree that he was very good and had a nice presence on the ice.

He might go down in his wage, but, is that up to us to decide what he might be worth? The market will tell. My guess is that some US dad wants his little gal to be a competitive dancer and will pay a price. He does appear to have a dry sense of humor which I appreciate.

[skatingspook]

James is seriously the funniest person I have ever met. :lol:

I remember this one time in Detroit, when he played a joke on everyone for April fools day. He came to the rink very early, and put up a sign infront of a directors parking space next to the door. The sign he fastened up read, "Parking for the British only - violators will be towed". The sign was professionally made. The parking space was literally right next to the front door, and everyone wanted to know how he came to have his own parking space. The Executive of the club thought it was so funny, James was allowed to keep the sign up and park next to the door for the rest of his time at Detroit Skating Club. I just love this guy! :bow:

[Purple_Velvet]

The absolute funniest part is the questions and answers section...


"Q: Are you serious about this? answered on: 08-Sep-04
A: Hey Augie. I am serious if your bid is. I expectd girls to reply. My two previous owners were female, but whatever..."

I assume he's talking to Augie Hill :lol: :roll:
James is very funny, and a very good ice dancer by the way!

[robertp]

Purple velvet...thanks for the insight and the laugh. He is obviously a funny and talented kid.

[what?meworry?]

...This guy doesn't even look like he's 16 years old. He should put his age down.

ok, i temporarily cannot find my nationals book that lists the novice competitors' birthdates. (when i find it i'll edit.)

however, i seem to recall that there was a big flap around the time about his age in that he was so much older than wingle. i think he was 18 at the time (she 5 or so years younger?). that would make him 20-21 now? but you're right, he looks 16.

edit to add: found it! (usfsa nationals jan 12-19, 2003) warren's birthdate: 2/15/85---so he's 19.5 now. (wingle's b'date 2/19/90.) just for fun: the novice ranking final standings then: 1)pratt/gilles 2)mccullough/dear 3) wingle/warren 4)cepican/lichtor 5)koob-doddy/antonelli 6)dail/dail 7)copley/wenzel 8)gober/deavers 9)scott/clark 10)palmer/stucke 11) hockel/thelen 12)lauten/lauten

[Aussie Willy]

The questions and answers are hilarious.

When I checked his page had been viewed 1190 times!!!!

[Rogue]

Rats. I was going to read the questions/answers, and those spoilsports at ebay had taken it down.

[skatingspook]

Not sure if this should have been posted to a new thread, but it's James Warren related. A few months ago he made a "Charlie White Online Store" for a practical joke. For those of you who want a further laugh following the eBay site, click the link. Don't forget to read what he writes for an introduction to the site. www.cafeshops.com/classiccharlie

[skatingspook]

P.S. I wanted to see how that auction ended. I presume ebay took it down. How disappointing. :cry:

[what?meworry?]

Not sure if this should have been posted to a new thread, but it's James Warren related. A few months ago he made a "Charlie White Online Store" for a practical joke. For those of you who want a further laugh following the eBay site, click the link. Don't forget to read what he writes for an introduction to the site. www.cafeshops.com/classiccharlie
great sleuthing, spook! this kid is an incredible writer! the tone and metre are exquisite. his dry humor draws the reader into the gag---and i've only read the intro.
i suspect we'll see and hear much more of this guy via the media in the years to come. at this tender age of 19.5, he's right up there with the all-time greats from monty python's flying circus!
my compliments to james, a most entertaining wit.

[Aussie Willy]

Gee someone to rival Polly Pooperak!!!!

I hear Polly was looking for a new partner because Wally has done his doodle. What a pity eBay took it down.

[flippet]

why? is there something funny in the water in manchester?There just might be...every person from Manchester that I've heard about seems to have an--shall we say--interesting sense of humor. :lol: Charmingly funny; dry, yet with a bit of flair.