Ooooh, yes....

My primary coach does the same too!!! It's like "YAAAAY!!! Jazzpants fell down!!!" (claps) (It's the coach's way of saying "Take more risk, darn it!!!")

Secondary coach (to the person next to her): "Oh, jazzpants actually fell down!!! Amazing!!!" (Very sarcastic tone.)

And you better believe at that moment I want to kill 'em... LOL!!!

Oh, and at my last lesson with primary coach, I totally had a big 3turn day and messed up my alt-FO3's by putting my free foot down before I should. Coach grabs my shoulders and gently yanks me as he says "That's it! I'm gonna make you fall down!!!"

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Cheers,
jazzpants

11-04-2006: Shredded "Pre-Bronze FS for Life" Club Membership card!!!
Silver Moves is the next "Mission Impossible"
(Dare I try for Championship Adult Gold someday???)

Thank you for the support, you guys!!!

Setting the scene:

I was having a lesson on our Free Dance with my then dance partner, my Free coach was stood watching and alongside them my friend was taking photos for my website.

We were doing a lift which was going well until he tripped on his toepicks ...



Instead of being worried about our welfare I heard my Free coach shout "Give me the camera, quick give me the camera" ..... so much for sympathy and support

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The best whisper is a click

TashaKat---That is soo funny! For the next holiday, that should be the picture on your card and your coach should definitely get one. I'm still chuckling. And oh...Are you okay? Snicker, snicker.

That was a while ago now and surprisingly neither of us were hurt. It was a good action shot though

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The best whisper is a click

Here is another one that just happened the other day.
Iskatealot lands an axel YAY! however I managed 2 do it and land with my arms above my head going "YES!" of course my coach looks over sees me arms over my head, has a complete laughing fit and then starts saying that if jumping with my arms over my head helps I ought to be doing it on all my double jumps.
Also while working on a flying camel. coach says "You are jumping way to much, it doesnt have to be that big" after the next flying camel she says "YOu still actually have to JUMP"
There are more and I could think of them while i was typing the first part of this. Unfortunatly I have now forgotten so I guess that is all until I remember...

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Hurrah for Desert Skaters! YAY for Jeff Buttle and Virtue and Moire!

LOL...my coach was at the ice show tonight (the 2nd night of my very first ice show ever) and afterwards when I asked him how I did, he said "We need to talk about the hands. What was this claw thing?" LOL Evidently during my attitude glide I had my fingers gripped in a claw like position, instead of a graceful open hand type thing.

I attributed it to nerves. I told him we'd work on that during Monday's lesson, LOL!! Yay, my first constructive criticism!

Also, during today's group lesson, he told me "keep that leg back, or I'm gonna tie a string around it!" LOL Poor guy, he doesn't know what he got himself into agreeing to coach me, LOL! Gotta luv him just for puttin up with me!

Suz

Hehe this is a really funny thread!

Well, my coach never really says anything like that to me, she just laughs really hard!! Yesterday I did a 3-turn and slipped, and she couldn't stop laughing!

-Jenna

My coach has done that to me before. Once, I was standing on the ice, talking to her, I think she was explaining something to me, and then all of a sudden, I fell flat on my face. I wasn't even moving! I think me and her were laughing for a full 5 minutes, and every time I htought about that during the lesson, I would start laughing again. Don't know how I managed to fall standing still. But apparently, I'm not her first student to fall while standing still. One apparently fell while holding onto the boards.

I get told to have more confidence and really push into things, like salchows, and jumps in general, but I refuse. I have a fear of falling and doing things at speed scare me slightly. I wish I could get over this!!!

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http://www.yourphotoalbums.co.uk

My old Free Coach used to tell say to me: "Don't let your leg hang out of your knickers" .... I never did understand that one (it was always said when I was jumping).

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The best whisper is a click

I'm just taking a brief two minute break at the barrier. Apparently my primary coach was also there talking with someone... He then said "Oh, everyone's skating lazy tonight...", then making sure I was within earshot, he said "Even jazzpants was skating lazy tonight too!!!"

Yeah??? YOU try skating for 1.5 hrs. the last two days and then skate this session too!!!

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Cheers,
jazzpants

11-04-2006: Shredded "Pre-Bronze FS for Life" Club Membership card!!!
Silver Moves is the next "Mission Impossible"
(Dare I try for Championship Adult Gold someday???)

Thank you for the support, you guys!!!

My secondary coach said this morning, "Oh, it's _so_ much
easier to teach singles than pairs or dance couples - at least they don't
argue as to whose fault it is!" (But it WAS his fault!!!). (The first rule of
ice dancing is that it's always the man's fault, and the second rule is that
even if it's the woman's fault, rule no 1 still applies!) (And it was his
fault, anyway)

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Mrs Redboots
~~~~~~~~
I love my computer because my friends live in it!
Ice dancers have lovely big curves!

Well I can only think of a couple....

-``We already have a zambonie man and a machine so you can get up and stop cleaning the ice with your butt!!!!!!!!!!!!``
- Partner : I told her that it was the right foot...
Coach : Yes, I know, I did too..
Me :
- Partner : Does it hurt when I lift your leg like this?
Me : Yes...
Coach : Perfect then...lift it higher...

I'll try to think of more of them....
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My boyfriend told me to choose between him and skating......................well i guess i'm gonna miss him
Sweet16*

Well i think the morning after Shae lynn borne and victor kratz stopped skating together My coach went on a I hate men (since I'm the only guy) streak for the day so it would be like

"I hate how you did that jump......and men.."

great fun!

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Lets Boogie!

Oh yes! How could I forget ..... When I used to skate with my ex-partner our coach used to call us either 'Bovril and Bean' or 'Bald and Crap'

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The best whisper is a click

Mine referred to one couple as "Awful and Been".....

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Mrs Redboots
~~~~~~~~
I love my computer because my friends live in it!
Ice dancers have lovely big curves!

On lesson with secondary coach today, she told me this when adressing step 4 on the 5 step mohawk:

"Be a bad Catholic girl and open up those legs!" (she's Catholic too!)

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Adult Nationals, 2009 "The Time of My Life"

My former instructor told me I looked like a dog peeing because of my leg position in stroking, or a spiral.
My current instructor, after often hearing some noises I make in frustration, told me I could get a job doing the voices in cartoons. He also said he would start calling me an "old woman" if I kept making noises or complaining, and he called me that once or twice.

Both of the above mentioned instructors have thought I was cussing when I wasn't, it just sounded like I was, and they scolded me for it. I went "psh" or something and they thought I was saying "sh*t"!

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Andrea

From Coach2 on Sunday: "Yes, you will hurt - welcome to the wonderful world of pairs skating!"

Coach1, watching me rolling on the ice after Husband dropped me: "I see you two are pushing your boundaries! I'm delighted!"

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Mrs Redboots
~~~~~~~~
I love my computer because my friends live in it!
Ice dancers have lovely big curves!

I had to go find this thread

When doing what I thought was a spiral the other day, I hear "get that leg up"

I say "I can't get it up"

Coach says " well I'm buying you some Viagra"

Yeah, it was an adult session.

(ps, I'm female)

Overheard at the rink recently, this exchange between two coaches:

"Why have all my skaters got the hump today?"

"Because they've been smoking Camels?"

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Mrs Redboots
~~~~~~~~
I love my computer because my friends live in it!
Ice dancers have lovely big curves!

Many moons ago I had a boyfriend that smoked Camels, soon kicked him into touch, they stink like Camels.

My coach had a very, erm, colourful way with words. One of her less rude ones was when I was doing a LFO spiral in my artistic number:

"Breakfast! Let's see your breakfast!" ..... she meant 'get your leg higher' ... eeew, gross

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The best whisper is a click

Apparently, I make funny faces when I'm spinning and jumping, because I tend to drop my chin which is not good, so I try to keep my head up, and it just gets me all messed up. She likes to mimic me afterwords.

Wow, some of the comments in here actually made me physically nauseous. If any of my coaches ever said that stuff to me (especially all the gross stuff about babies, hemmorhoids, defecation, and whatnot...), I'd quit immediately. My coaches are very cordial and very proper, and I enjoy that very much. Then again I've always had very cordial and straight forward coaches throughout my life. No jokes allowed, really. Works better for me that way, joking would make it too much like hanging out and not enough like him training me and ordering me to do things and me doing them without making excuses. If I screw up, all I hear from my coaches is what I did wrong, and how to fix it. If I do something well, all I hear is 'fine, do it again...ten times". I respect my coaches and very much care what they think about me and my skating, but if they said any of the crap above, there's no way I could because I would think they were crude and not very respectful of me. Especially with the swearing. Maybe I am a minority, though.