New coach etiquette/parents

[littlekateskate]

Would you please list some of what you find most important that needs to be discussed when starting with a new coach for the first time.

Like would it be appropriate to write them a letter and give them a little skating background of the child. Your expectations? Ect. Sometimes I feel a letter is easier because its on their time. And then they can respond or what not.

Is a letter tacky. Should you wait for the coach to ask you questions? Any ideas would be helpful.

Thanks

[sk84ever&ever]

You are on the right track!! Communication no matter what form is a fantastic idea. In the letter maybe offer other ways for the coach to communicate with you if letter writting is not their thing, such as email or a phone call.

Getting all your answers in writing will be great for future reference too. In case any issue may arise.

Any new students I take on I send them an email of my expectations and a little questionnaire to fill out so that I know what they expect.

Good luck with your new coach.

[SynchroSk8r114]

Any new students I take on I send them an email of my expectations and a little questionnaire to fill out so that I know what they expect.


I do the exact same thing.

I generally want to know: the child's age; skating level; how many days he/she will take lessons and for how long; how much they are looking to spend (so that I can keep within their budget); skating goals; if there's a desire to compete, test, or simply skate recreationally; prior coaches; etc.

I don't think a letter is by any means tacky. I agree that offering other ways (e-mail, home/cell #) are good because it adds another form of communication, which is key to any good relationship, skating-related or not. For instance, I have a mother whose four girls I teach and she frequently sends me letters via e-mail, which is convenient because I can print them out and have her schedule for a certain week or any dates that her kids will be on vacation.

[sk8tmum]

A letter can put you off on the wrong foot, if it is "misinterpreted". It's hard to judge tone, style etc - when you can't see the other individual's faces. Part of what I do (believe it or not :D) is teach communication skills; and I always warn people to walk softly where they are looking at one-way communication where you can't establish rapport or shift message and delivery based on response.

There are some coaches I know who would be absolutely offended by a letter from a parent outlining the parent's expectations; there are others who would be fine with it. If you're starting out, that's the kind of thing you need to know. Other parents with the same coach - maybe they have some input from their dealings with that coach?

Generally, in these sort of situations, I would suggest that you talk first, to get an idea of the style and tenor that your coach likes (are they formal? informal? how do they like to be communicated with? Are they e-mail friendly? Do they like you to be part of the steering committee, or part of the cleanup crew (if you know what I mean)) - and then go forward accordingly. It's so hard to recover from a bad start, and you want to be sure that both sides understand each other. Ask if the coach wants you to follow up with a summary of expectations; you want them to be comfortable with what you intend on doing. Some coaches have a semi-formal contract outlining their expectations, your responsibilities etc (at one point, not sure if it still is, it was a requirement at Skate Canada).

Coaching is a very personal relationship: You're trusting someone with your child, and you want to have a good relationship with that person. Establishing personal rapport, and establishing how everyone thinks at the beginning is important. As an example: most coaches around here are addressed by their first name - I asked a new coach if he was comfortable with that, and he admitted that he found it uncomfortable to have a 6-year old address him by his first name, although he doesn't make an issue of it. By respecting that small thing, which came out in dialogue, we've established a positive understanding, and it's helped. But, that came out in a face-to-face meeting, for which I paid for the coaching time, and I wouldn't have gotten that insight otherwise.

[dbny]

A letter can put you off on the wrong foot, if it is "misinterpreted". It's hard to judge tone, style etc - when you can't see the other individual's faces.
<snip>
Generally, in these sort of situations, I would suggest that you talk first, to get an idea of the style and tenor that your coach likes (are they formal? informal? how do they like to be communicated with? Are they e-mail friendly? Do they like you to be part of the steering committee, or part of the cleanup crew (if you know what I mean)) - and then go forward accordingly. It's so hard to recover from a bad start, and you want to be sure that both sides understand each other. Ask if the coach wants you to follow up with a summary of expectations; you want them to be comfortable with what you intend on doing. Some coaches have a semi-formal contract outlining their expectations, your responsibilities etc (at one point, not sure if it still is, it was a requirement at Skate Canada).

Coaching is a very personal relationship: You're trusting someone with your child, and you want to have a good relationship with that person. Establishing personal rapport, and establishing how everyone thinks at the beginning is important. As an example: most coaches around here are addressed by their first name - I asked a new coach if he was comfortable with that, and he admitted that he found it uncomfortable to have a 6-year old address him by his first name, although he doesn't make an issue of it. By respecting that small thing, which came out in dialogue, we've established a positive understanding, and it's helped. But, that came out in a face-to-face meeting, for which I paid for the coaching time, and I wouldn't have gotten that insight otherwise.


ITA. I have to add that the very last thing I ever want to get from a parent is a letter! I do not need more paper to dispose of one way or another :frus:. Email, OTOH, is easily filed, then found if needed again, kills no trees, and does not add to the pounds of recycling I have to put out every week.

[littlekateskate]

Just for another note. I love email its my favorite form of communication. However that was the first question i asked this coach. And they dont even have email! :)

[Mrs Redboots]

The most important thing is that you need to make sure your coach can contact you - give them all your phone numbers plus your email; after all, emergencies arise and your coach may need to contact you in a hurry to tell you not to come in today for whatever reason.

Make sure that you are clear on what their charges are, not only for lessons but for other services (cutting music, blade adjustment/sharpening, competitions, tests) if appropriate, and how they like to be paid - do you pay each session, or do you pay weekly or even monthly? What is their cancellation policy?

Have you their contact details - again, all telephone numbers and e-mail if appropriate - so you can contact them and give them appropriate notice if you/your skater can't make the session.

[sk84ever&ever]

So the coach doesn't do email....so then maybe the coach would appreciate a letter. Do get everything such as fees and expectations in writing. If this coach is hard to reach or unwilling to be helpful then guess what...this is the wrong coach for your family. Just try to be kind and respectful and if that doesn't work move on!!!:D

To see if your child is getting good technical advice check out skatingjumpsecrets.com. It's an educational skating website for parents. skaters and coaches.

Good luck.

[kayskate]

Personally, I like to talk to parents face-to-face, at least at first. Email is fine afterward. Don't know how I would feel about a letter. I guess it depends on the situation.

Kay

[CanAmSk8ter]

Does your child have learning issues or health concerns that the coach should know about? If not, I wouldn't write a letter. Chances are, your child is not the first skater her age and level this coach has taught- if she has questions about her skating background, she'll ask you. Often those kind of questions don't come up until the skater has had a couple of lessons with the new coach anyway.

If you have questions for the coach, write them down and at the first lesson just mention, "I had a couple of questions for you... is now a good time to talk, or is there a way I could reach you tonight or tomorrow?" That way you'll get her contact info as well. She may have a sheet written up for you outlining her policies anyway; most coaches have something like that to hand out to new students.

[dbny]

Just for another note. I love email its my favorite form of communication. However that was the first question i asked this coach. And they dont even have email! :)

8O no offence intended, but really! Even my most computer/tech phobic friends have email (and in my age group there are quite a few with those phobias :roll:).

[littlekateskate]

Well, I chose the letter route. I added smiley faces and frowns lol to make sure my point was taken correctly. Lol

And apologized for writing a letter explaining it wouldnt be a regular thing. As well that i have younger children with me when at lessons and having a conversation let alone remembering it is sometimes quite difficult lol which is so true.

Thanks for your advice and input!!