rant thread

[ibreakhearts66]

so i noticed my pet peeve's thread got lots of responses, so i thought i'd start one for specific rants. i'll start :D :D :D

bahhhhhhh. people annoy me.

ok, so last saturday, i was at the rink for public session bc i had been there earlier making costumes and decided to skate with friends. note, this is a saturday session right after skating school, so its crowded. well, one girl decides that a crowded session is an appropriate time to do lutzes (from the backcrossover take-off mind you, not the choctaw-step entrance) and, over course, pays no attention to where she is placing her backcrossovers. well, i am skating in the PROPER direction along with everyone else, and she crashes right into me. no apology, nothing. luckily i am very steady on my skates and she wasn't going too fast, but she could have really hurt me! she was a taller, curvier girl and really could have knocked someone over.

this same girl, another saturday, did a flying camel inches from my friend's face. my friend stood there and said "umm..are you even gonna say anything?" figuring the girl who almost chopped off her nose would apologize or something. instead, she gets a very snobby "yeah, next time, move."

AHHHHH!!!!

ok, another rant. as i said on the other thead, i have a jumping spot. it is the only spot i am willing to jump in at this specific rink. all of the times i have kicked myself or fallen really hard it has been on the other side, so i just don't jump there anymore. people LOVE to hang out in my jumping spot! its not like its a particularly random spot. in fact, it is one of the jumping corners. well, one coach loves to teach spins IN THAT CORNER. other people just kinda stand there and im just like "AHHH I WANT TO JUMP!!!!!" i never say anything of course, because God forbid I ask anyone to do anything for me, but sh** man! some day i may very very politely ask the coach if she could maybe coach a few feet to the left and explain that i am neurotic.

ok so another thing that was REALLY been pissing me off. so, as you all probably know by the number of times i have complained about it, i struggle with my axel. i just play mind games and pop them. also, you guys know that my landing leg is shot, i've had a knee and ankle surgery on that side and need hip surgery. well, one girl at the rink still finds it appropriate to make a comment every time i fall. i was doing an axel (and actually rotated it!) and fell, and she goes "what was that?" i told her it was an axel. she goes "i thought you always landed axels." BAH! i actually sort of stood up for myself and said "look, i have a bad hip, knee, and ankle, and i really don't need you pointing out every time i fall." i mean, i think she just hasn't learned to censor her thoughts yet, as she has been known to go up to people and say "wow, that spin really traveled" but still!

ok this final rant is more of a personal one, but maaaan it still eats at me.

so i struggled with anorexia really badly. i was hospitalized twice for extended periods of time (as in months) and nearly died quite a few times. this was pretty common knowledge at the rink. its fairly obvious that a girl is sick when she loses 30 pounds off an already underweight frame. well, one woman, lets call her J, made, and continues to make, incredibly inappropriate comments. i believe i have spoken about this before, but once is not enough!

first comment. i come out of the bathroom after my second hospitalization (and still only weigh about 100 pounds at 5'5) and she stops me to say "you have a nice body. you have a nice, flat stomach, and shapely thighs." ok, i realize that to the average person this is a compliment, but all i heard was "SHAPELY THIGHS" which, of course, equals THUNDER THIGHS. well, a week or two later, she made another comment and said "you know, you really aren't that skinny." at that point, i mentioned it to my coach, and found out she had been telling my coach she didn't think i was that skinny either! well, i talked to her about it and said (very nicely, just like a good little anorexic) "J, could you please not make comments about my body? Its just that its a really sensitive subject right now." You know what she says? "I can talk about whatever I like." :!: :!: :!: :!: :!:

but oh no, she can't stop with my body. so she used to sponsor a little 10 year old (started sponsoring her when she was 5). well, she put this girl on a diet when she was 5 to lose about 7 pounds (which is like 15 percent of a 5 year old's body weight). well, she was busy complaining about this girl's body to her coach (also my coach). one girl told her that sometimes girls just grow out before they grow up, but that she'll grow into her body. J says "speak from your own experience, I was never like that." so, our coach tries to reassure her too. well, J then says to the coach "yeah, well you ahve a tendency to be fat anyways."

there are so many more stories like this about her, but ugh, i have to stop somewhere

[SkatingOnClouds]

Ouch!!!! Sounds like you have quite a lot to rant about. Most of the time I can just shut it all out but sometimes I have to have a rant.

[Award]

Its just that its a really sensitive subject right now." You know what she says? "I can talk about whatever I like." :!: :!: :!: :!: :!:

Sounds like this person is trying to attack you with snubs - psychological attacks. I'm not sure what she's like, but it does sound like her nature is not very nice. Sometimes, it's necessary to make it known that you don't like what she says.....for example, if she keeps persisting with this kind of behavior, even after you've asked her not to, then it's time to speak loudly - particularly in front of everyone, and say really loud ..... something like 'look! I'm telling you not to say those things about me!!....so shut it!!'. Not so diplomatic, but when sneaky people think they can keep 'bullying' you, you really have to show them something to start with...like show them you're not the kind to be snubbed. But this all really depends on what that person is really like. So need to determine whether or not they're deliberately messing with your feelings or well-being.

[Skate@Delaware]

Some people, you need to treat diplomatically, others you don't. You need to determine on your own which is which.

I raised my daughter to be an independent thinker (thank goodness) and she did pretty good (still does). When one rude woman said (of her scarred-up ankles from breaking in new skates) "What happened to your legs?" my daughter retorted with "What happened to your face?" because this woman was in everyone's business!!!

She was good at ignoring those who pestered her with stupid, vain, or rude remarks or looking at them with a good eye-roll and skating away. With others, she just looked at them and would say, "R-i-g-h-t" and continue on her way. What a brush-off! No matter what they said, she would do this! She was very pretty but very overweight and had to endure rude comments about this over and over and over again throughout 4 years of skating at our rink. This attitude got her through it and basically gave the person being rude no fuel for thier fire.

Most people who attack you verbally are trying to hurt you. If you can show that they are not successful they will eventually stop.

As for the girl that persists in getting into everyone's way during public session, maybe a well-placed hipcheck or skate will take care of her (my bad?)

[Jennifer28]

LATE AN FORMS! Feeling like you're no priority & the kids competition forms are up on time!

[peanutskates]

well, one coach loves to teach spins IN THAT CORNER.

maybe, that's what the coach (or her students) think... "i have a psychological need to do spins in that corner... but there's this one person who is just obsessed with jumping in that corner..." umm yeah... there are 4 corners on a rink, do you really fall on 3 of them? or, just imagine that the other corner is that corner. try harder to overcome your attachment

[herniated]

ibreakhearts66. OMG!!!8O that woman J is out - of- control!! My experience with people who put others down or in her case, just plain cruel to others really feel very insecure about themselves. It makes them feel better, at least for a short time to know they have hurt someone or are hurting someone else. She obviously needs to get some help.

[Caris]

Sounds like she deliberately trying to upset you and get a reaction, which she has so she'll probably be happy with that and keep doing it.

I was once told that the best form of revenge is indifference and really do believe it to be true. Take absolutely no notice at all and do all your swearing and anger in your head or to other people that she has nothing to do with. Typical bullies always get bored if they're not getting anywhere. Even more irritating for her will be if you're nice to her too!

[Skate@Delaware]

the corner thing strikes a nerve with me. Although I can understand your need to keep to that particular corner it is a learned behavior and you can work to undo it.

I run across the same thing when it comes to working with show numbers with the girls (mostly I'm 45+, they are under 18)....they can't work on it UNLESS IT IS IN THE SAME EXACT SPOT WHERE THEY LEARNED IT!!! This bothers me because later on we ALWAYS have to move it (because of props, or other skaters, etc being in the way) then they are messed up for quite some time.

I don't know if it's a familiarity thing or an inflexibility thing-any psychologists here?

[ibreakhearts66]

maybe, that's what the coach (or her students) think... "i have a psychological need to do spins in that corner... but there's this one person who is just obsessed with jumping in that corner..." umm yeah... there are 4 corners on a rink, do you really fall on 3 of them? or, just imagine that the other corner is that corner. try harder to overcome your attachment
But I'm craaaaazy remember? No I mean I do ok jumping else where, but I really do prefer that one corner for axels. I've kicked myself so many times in the other place to not be a little crazy about it. And hey, all skaters must be a little neurotic right?

[Caris]

It is a familiarty confidence thing, but not in the least bit helpful to them as there will always be instances where there are things stopping them doing it in that corner. Also if they do it on another rink in competiton even if it's the same corner, just it being a different rinks' corner could cause problems.

In my sport I have always had my girls do their skills on different apparatus, facing different directions and starting from different places on the apparatus as they learn them so there is no superstiton attached to the skill. They learn they can do the skill full stop. Not do the skills providing it is on the same piece of kit facing the same way starting in the right place. That way when we take it into competition there is no problem.

I've seen this in skating too, although I'm still a real beginner, I do what I have learned all over the rink as I learn it as that's the way I've always done things. I have seen loads of people have to stick to one circle, one corner, one section. The way I see it you're doing it on a piece of ice, there is ice all over the rink, it's not different in that one place, not softer/harder/smoother/safer ect it's just ice!