so frustrated

[nemo]

I have no idea where to turn....

our daughter has had a hell of a last couple years....including a dislocated knee. this past spring ...after that happened...she decided that her goal was to pass her prenovice singles test for sectionals this year....(it had been a goal also the year before...but the coaches for whatever reason weren't taking it seriously)...

we are having major jump issues....she passed her jr silver fs three weeks after her dislocation with flying colors....[we didn't want her to go back but with a brace and the fact that the dislocation went back into place and some physio, the doc said she could...anyway.....]

she was having some trouble in spring with the 2 flip, 2 lutz....but went to a doug leigh seminar with tebby and barkell...and the second day of the seminar was landing all doubles clean as clean can be...consistently...she came back to her rink full of confidence...continued to land 2 lutz, sometimes the flip. started summer school 1st week was landing her 2 lutz and a 2 flip 2 toe. then.....coach told her to change the technique (from the seminar) and wanted her to do it " his way"....

she can't remember the seminar technique and more or less has lost both those jumps....3 of every 20 flips get landed...the lutz is now worse than it was 6 months ago....

she discovered halfway into summer that the choreographer wasnt' going to work with her this summer...we approached the coach...they said well she will be need to arrange it...not done...

last season...music at provincial level she competed with all season was a half minute too short....we as parents were the ones to discover it a week before comp registration....their excuse was didn't notice...

now a week before the prenovice test forms due, the coach comes to us telling us her program won't pass as it now is, and that without her 2 flip or 2 lutz...she can't compete in prenovice...[but yet he passed another child in the test the month before without the 2 lutz]

he suggests staying starskate another year and see if she's ready. seems to be the story of her life with this coach...always something else or some other excuse every year about something.

our child feels betrayed as she worked really hard....he apparently asked her recently how come she can't skate like other girls on that ice who are younger....now she is really upset and self confidence out the window....

we are at a loss.....as to what to do...he made us handle it by telling us to ask her to consider not doing the test, and that he didn't want her to think she couldn't do that level but it was a big goal and thinks she should do starskate again. now that we have wasted summer, wasted time and money, and lots of other things..and she worked hard through her pain, made her sacrifices etc...she is furious and feels led down the path yet again this year.

whenever we say what we feel to coach, he penalizes her....like 3 years ago took away her 2 sal saying she needed to pass some test for them before she could do it...though she was landing it clean...it took a year for her to get the damn thing back after that....

now she constantly overrotates all her 2 sal, 2 loop, 2 toe, and almost landed her 2 axel...but they stoppped her...

problem is, no good freeskate coaches in our area....what do we do...we know she can do it...we saw her do it at seminar and right after...what is different about leigh technique that it works for her....but that no one else seems to be able to do for her?

she's pretty upset about these two jumps and we don't want to be nightmare skating parents...but what do you do when trust has been breached too many times?????

help!!!!

[phoenix]

Sounds like time to make a choice....skating w/ bad coach & lower your expectations accordingly, move, or drive to a better coach if it's workable---lots of people drive quite a ways once or twice a week for lessons. Or perhaps look into dance or synchro or some way to keep her skating that will get her away from this coach.

[jp1andOnly]

perhaps the coach doesnt want your daughter to struggle in pre-novice. Honestly, the standards to pass a pre novice test compared to a junior silver test are totally different. I know where I live, most pre novice girls have all doubles consistent and many are doing double axels, etc

As for overrotating jumps..just cause i skater overrotates doesnt mean they are ready for triples. Overrotating actually is bad technique.

I think you need to sit down with the coach and go over goals for the year. Perhaps the coach really doesn't understand what your daughter wants. Perhaps she needs to be in on the meeting and explain that she's willing to come last every competition but wants to take the test. As for the wrong timing, ya thats a mistake on their part to say the least.

If it isnt working out, then you have to sit down and figure out what to do next. Sometimes its better to move on then be frustrated all the time.

Your daughter sounds like she has lots of drive and is willing to work hard. No matter what happens hopefully she can continue to find enjoyment in the sport

[nemo]

we tried to have a coach meeting once...two years ago...it was a disaster...it was almost like he does his own thing regardless of what the "plan" is....

we tried dance. unfortunately her coach used to be an ice dancer. so he was the coach for dance too. it didn't work out.

to add to trust issues, she was offered another try out with the same boy in two different years. the first year, we found out later he botched the tryout by acting uninterested and telling the other coach he didn't think she was ready [though she was ahead of the boy skating and dance wise] and then the second time they asked....this past year....we were led to believe the boy was no longer dancing and thats why the tryout that she was "on the list for" didn't happen....till she saw the boy with new partner at a rink in SWO....we asked for a reason why she didn't get the tryout from our coach and he never gave us an answer.

she'd rather do pairs anyway...she's a real risk taker.

we understand the not wanting to overwhelm her with prenovice, its a big step what with the injury and maybe she's attempting to over-reach...we're trying to get her to buy into the idea that maybe she can pass the test before christmas [if we can get those two jumps resolved-which is the current problem-someone alluded to overrotation being bad technique]
then she could do a mid winter comp to get the feeling of how prenovice works and reevaluate in the spring as to the next move....of course, then the question becomes whether or not the coach is willing to buy in..or whether he will just do what he seems to be doing the last couple years and just agreeing and then doing his own thing.

I'm a professional in my field and I would never dream of asking someone other than myself to "handle" my client. let alone tell them I'm doing one thing then do another.

looking at all options, keep those suggestions coming. last thing we want to see her do is drop out wondering why the hell do it if I;m not working for something.....

[CanadianAdult]

I passed a test before I was ready for it, as a result I will be last in competition for the rest of my life. I'm an adult though, I made the decisions knowing what would happen and I don't mind so much being clobbered by friends I can drink with afterwards. :P

There's a zillion pre-novice girls out there, and less then ten percent of them get out of their section (ont, que). It's a great achievement to have the test, it indicates a level of skating that very few others have. If your daughter is willing to get the test for the test's sake and damn the consequences, push the point. She can have the comp test and go competitive for the year, or she can have the comp test and still register as Starskate and compete junior silver (? on the pn equivalency) and spend the season in Starskate deciding what her body can do but she'd have the test.

I've got two theories for the test. The first is to take the test as a learning experience to get the feedback from the judges (not the coach) on what needs improvement. Apparently I skated well enough to get the test on my "practice test" 8O

The second is to be able to fit in with everyone else. If you're skating at a rink that is mostly comp skaters, being in starskate can be considered second class. If it is better for the social aspect to be pre-novice <<and be last>>, then push for the test.

But but but, at the end of all of this, you've got a breach of trust with your coach, you're not happy, your daughter's not happy and your coach is ignoring you. You've seen the other side of the fence and are wondering who is right. It's not about the test, but the test is going to determine where you go from here.

[herniated]

is there no other ice rink within a reasonable distance, where there are other coaches? I'm a parent (not of a skater) but this coaches behavior and lack of professionalism is horrible. Never mind how he speaks to your daughter. Anyway, I hope there is another alternative for you. Any chance of finding out if the Doug Leigh seminar is being offererd anywhere else?

[nemo]

grin....

to answer the Leigh seminar question...if we could get into the summer school now...

we'd be on our way there.....

if there is a seminar around WOS anywhere.....let me know.....

[herniated]

forgive my ignorance but what does WOS mean? And if I hear of any seminars with Leigh I'll let you know.

[jp1andOnly]

WOS has quite a few bigger training sites, good ones at that. Most towns have an arena elsewhere within an hour. I'm from WOS originally so I do know the area.(as well as most skating clubs since I was involved in WOS on various levels)


grin....

to answer the Leigh seminar question...if we could get into the summer school now...

we'd be on our way there.....

if there is a seminar around WOS anywhere.....let me know.....

[doofsy]

WOS has quite a few bigger training sites, good ones at that. Most towns have an arena elsewhere within an hour. I'm from WOS originally so I do know the area.(as well as most skating clubs since I was involved in WOS on various levels)

I have to agree with jp1andOnly..... pretty much every area in WO has at least one decent training site within an hour or so drive.... if your daughter is dead-set on passing her Pre-Novice test and you're willing to commit the time and money to see it happen, make the change ASAP. You only have 2 months and 3 days to get this test passed, so you've gotta do what you've gotta do at this point.... and .... the good thing about passing the PN test is that she doesn't have to compete Pre-Novice next year if she realizes it's not for her. (in regards to the poster above who said that they are unfortunately stuck at a level too high for them forever).. your daughter can return to StarSkate if she wants to next year.

If you need some reccomendations on good coaches/training sites in or near your town, PM me, I might be able to help.

[doofsy]

herniated..... WOS= Western Ontario Section (Southwestern Ontario). Ontario is the only province that is divided up into sections by Skate Canada... the rest are all just one section.

Hope that helps.

[herniated]

Yes, it does help. Thanks!!!:)