boys being made fun of because they skate

[sk8parent]

does anyone have any advice when it comes to their kids being made fun of because they figure skate? how do you encourage your sons to ignore the comments of it being a girlie sport? just trying to be prepared in case this happens down the road.:??

[jp1andOnly]

lets see..2-3 guys for 15-20 girls. How about those odds?

I can jump ----- many times in the air..lets see you try it.

My brother had a bunch of good friends so he wasnt bugged too much. Plus, after he won a few big competitions, he started being proud to skate. It wasa bit challenging around age 13-14, but after that it wasnt so bad.

does anyone have any advice when it comes to their kids being made fun of because they figure skate? how do you encourage your sons to ignore the comments of it being a girlie sport? just trying to be prepared in case this happens down the road.:??

[sk8parent]

Thanks For The Reply. Yeah My Son Who Is 9 Had His 6'2''cousin Trying To Do His Jumps. His Cousin Said Nothing But Positive Things While Trying To Do Things In The Air. He Really Does Not Mind Being The Only Boy On The Ice Most Of The Time. But I Bring Him To Bigger Rinks To Visit And Watch The Older Guys Skate. He Is Totally Amazed When He Sees How High Those Guys Can Jump. So Yeah I Do Like To Expose Him To Other Guys Skating So He Knows He Isn't Alone In This Sport.

[jp1andOnly]

Yes, that was another thing....going to a bigger rink with more boys. they tend to work together


Thanks For The Reply. Yeah My Son Who Is 9 Had His 6'2''cousin Trying To Do His Jumps. His Cousin Said Nothing But Positive Things While Trying To Do Things In The Air. He Really Does Not Mind Being The Only Boy On The Ice Most Of The Time. But I Bring Him To Bigger Rinks To Visit And Watch The Older Guys Skate. He Is Totally Amazed When He Sees How High Those Guys Can Jump. So Yeah I Do Like To Expose Him To Other Guys Skating So He Knows He Isn't Alone In This Sport.

[3skatekiddos]

My 10 YO DS just started figure skating. But he also plays hockey so his response to anyone asking is that it helps with his hockey.
He has started noticing the boy/girl ratio though :)

Small brag ( grin, sorry, you guys are the only ones who "get" it ) He has been skating for 6 weeks and has a waltz jump, toe loop, salchow and just landed a few good lutz's last night. His coach is pretty impressed with him. He's worked his butt off.

[Rob Dean]

does anyone have any advice when it comes to their kids being made fun of because they figure skate? how do you encourage your sons to ignore the comments of it being a girlie sport? just trying to be prepared in case this happens down the road.:??

My son will be 14 next month, and we've been skating for just over three years. He's in 8th grade, which is a rough time for anyone, and I gather he takes quite a bit of comment on his skating. I'll get him to look over my shoulder and answer for himself this evening.

Rob Dean

[Laura H]

Hi!! My son is also 9 and a freestyle skater (currently working on Lutz, Axel prep, camel & sit spins) . . . I continue to be amazed that he maintains his enthusiasm because he is very sensitive to "what others think" and I figured teasing would be a problem. However, mostly the other kids are just impressed with his jumps and think it's cool. He has had the occasional "skating is for girls" comment . . . I forget what his stock response is, I think he just laughs it off or says "not the way I do it!" (I suppose another good response would be "I guess someone forgot to tell that to the guys in the Olympics!!!").

He does have to wear his "cool" practice clothes though . . . and when he competed in a comp in February, he skated to music from "Top Gun" in camo pants and a black T . . . anyone would be hard pressed to term that "girly!" :lol:

[Mrs Redboots]

Here, although fewer young men skate than young women, there isn't the "perception" about male figure skaters that there appears to be in the USA.

Those adolescent boys who do skate, when teased, normally ask where else they can be surrounded by flocks of beautiful girls! And if they should happen to wish to go out for pairs or ice dance, that is a sure and certain way to be very popular indeed!!!!

[SynchroSk8r114]

I think 13-14 yrs. old is around that age when most boys begin to experience being made fun of for figure skating. Happened to my dance partner - he stuck it out and he's done pretty well nationally. I guess it all depends on the child though. 13-14 yrs. old is a hard age for any skater. Think it's really that "make or break" period when kids want to skate, but also want to have a social life, and find that they must make a decision. Good luck to your son!

[TreSk8sAZ]

At my old rink, we had three boys.

One (12), who made it to Jr. Nats this year, is one of the oddest boys you'll ever meet and doesn't pay attention to the teasing at all, which has mostly stopped since he did so well.

One (14) could never take it. If there were people from his school or sommeone he knew not from the rink, he would get off the ice and change back into street clothes rather than continuing to practice. Whenever a television crew would come in, he would hide until they stopped filming. It was really sad, but he just couldn't take it.

One (17) was teased mercelissly. He's stuck with it and is doing pairs now. The teasing has stopped as they've matured, but when he was 14-15, wow was it bad. He didn't let it bother him much. But he did find the perfect answer once he went to Canada to train -- "Where else do you have co-ed locker rooms?" That really did shut the other kids up!

[liz_on_ice]

does anyone have any advice when it comes to their kids being made fun of because they figure skate? how do you encourage your sons to ignore the comments of it being a girlie sport? just trying to be prepared in case this happens down the road.:??

You'd think that "girls, lots of them, all in spandex, with really nice butts" would be a sufficient answer. Clearly of course it's not, or there would be waaayyyyy more male figure skaters.

A little cross-training could go a long way, being seen as good at another sport might help the image problem. I bet a figure skater could whip ### on a skateboard in no time.

[dmmains]

I have two sons that are both figure skaters. They're 11 and 12 (5th and 6th grade). So far they don't have any issues at school about their skating. They both wear their team jackets to school everyday with pride. This may all change as puberty kicks in, we'll see. I always tell the boys to be proud of what they do. It may be different than what the other boys do but they shouldn't let other's opinions influence them.

Where I've noticed they get the most grief is from the hockey players at our rink. Not the younger kids, mind you, but usually the high school age boys and the adults. Many times at the end of a practice session a group of younger hockey players are waiting for the ice and as my sons get off I'll hear the boys tell them that they're pretty good. That makes my boys feel really good. They don't get the same kind of comments from the older groups. They usually get snide comments as they walk by. My husband, who happens to be a hockey player, just tells them to ignore it.

I do think that a lot of boys are conditioned from a very young age away from figure skating. There's many Dads out there that won't even allow their sons to put on figure skates. You know them...just watch any tot or low-level learn to skate class and you'll see the boys out there with hockey skates. That's how young it starts. Unfortunately there's a lot of boys out there that would probably love figure skating and would be very good at it but they've just never had the chance to try it.

Our skating programs don't help either. When my sons were starting out I often saw instructors not give my boys attention during their LTS classes. I know this was not intentional. My assumption was that subconsciously they knew that boys don't stay in skating so focus on the girls instead. My boys were lucky enough to have a great male instructor at around the beta/gamma level and he served as an incredible role model for them and they've been hooked on skating ever since.

I'd love for there to be more boys in figure skating, but I don't see that happening in the culture we live in. As a result we'll have to teach our boys to have thick skins and prove to everyone how cool it is to be a figure skater.

[litigator]

tell your son if he decides to do pairs or ice dance especially...grin...he will have girls lining up trying to "land" him....:lol: ...at our rink all the boys are very popular with the "ladies".....grin.....

[Rob Dean]

Where I've noticed they get the most grief is from the hockey players at our rink. Not the younger kids, mind you, but usually the high school age boys and the adults.


Obviously with a son this is sort of a hot button topic with me, and I'll still have his comments later. :)

I had the opportunity to observe the junior hockey players (late elementary/early middle school?) at close range at our rink a couple of weeks back. They were crowding the door so that the figure skating session before them has a hard time emptying, the whole time running through a routine of "Why *is* there figure skating?"; "Yell if you hate figure skating"; "He didn't yell loud enough, he must like figure skating"; etc. They condition them early. At son's age he's above caring what "little" kids think of him, but I doubt these, um, junior barbarians will be growing up to be fans of figure skating anytime soon...

Rob

[Sparkey]

My son's favorite comment to rude hockey players is that they are showering with other guys, while he is watching girls undress.

Crude but effective.

[dmmains]

My son's favorite comment to rude hockey players is that they are showering with other guys, while he is watching girls undress.

Crude but effective.

That's a good one. I'll have to share that with my boys. I did just share it with my husband, who is a hockey player, and he chuckled.

[Isk8NYC]

I do think that a lot of boys are conditioned from a very young age away from figure skating. There's many Dads out there that won't even allow their sons to put on figure skates. You know them...just watch any tot or low-level learn to skate class and you'll see the boys out there with hockey skates. Don't tell them, but the Learn-to-PLAY skating lessons are basically the same thing as Learn-to-SKATE. The only difference is that the LTS kids learn skating faster since their parents are smart enough to listen when the instructor says to use figure skates for the first session of lessons. The over-equipped LTP boys struggle during every lesson, trying to balance on hockey skates while wearing pounds of pads and gloves that keep them from getting back up again! LOL

I still give the obligatory speech, but only the really intelligent parents listen. (They say "thanks" later on, though, so it's worth a try.)

As for a snappy comeback, how about... "I like my teeth in my mouth, not a glass. So do all the pretty girls."

[Mrs Redboots]

I had the opportunity to observe the junior hockey players (late elementary/early middle school?) at close range at our rink a couple of weeks back. They were crowding the door so that the figure skating session before them has a hard time emptying, the whole time running through a routine of "Why *is* there figure skating?"; "Yell if you hate figure skating"; "He didn't yell loud enough, he must like figure skating"; etc. They condition them early. At son's age he's above caring what "little" kids think of him, but I doubt these, um, junior barbarians will be growing up to be fans of figure skating anytime soon...

RobRoughly once a month we go to a dance club at another rink, and the club session is followed by adult (non-elite) hockey - either training or an informal match. So we have been known to barrack the hockey players: "Oh, look at the ones who've chosen the easy option" or "Poor dears, imagine preferring to skate with a stick than with a woman!"

One year at our National Championships there was a stall selling mugs with the legend "If figure skating were easy, they'd call it hockey", which would make a very good T-shirt slogan for any slightly self-conscious figure skater.

I do know several people who do both disciplines, if not all three if you could ice dance as separate from figure skating, but oddly, a majority are women! Perhaps we multi-task better....

[Figureskates]

I started figure skating in my early teens.

At college I played a little hockey on a lower level team. I remember after an edge drill the coach said, "It's obvious who the figure skater is....he's the only one who has edges and control."

When I was figure skating when I was in Junior High School, I got the usual razzing. But what drove them nuts was when the pretty girls who say hi to me in the hall, ignoring the remainder of the troglodytes....the girls were all figure skaters!

[Sessy]

Evgeni Plushenko has mentioned some in his interviews and films. I think he said somewhere that at some point, he'd dived head-first into a big pile of snow with a wall behind it, crashing into it hurting himself, just to prove figure skaters were tough. I think he said mainly he'd just knock people on their faces who had something to say about his alledged girlyness.

I think your best bet is to have the kid do other things than skating as well, be athletic overall, so that he just is a really high jumper and can show figure skating for the force effort it takes and not so much being the prima ballerina. Besides it's a great way to meet chicks, which every teenage guy wants ;)
I think doing some hockey might be good next to figure skating, figure skaters who do hockey seem to have better stamina as well.

[Sessy]

Roughly once a month we go to a dance club at another rink, and the club session is followed by adult (non-elite) hockey - either training or an informal match. So we have been known to barrack the hockey players: "Oh, look at the ones who've chosen the easy option" or "Poor dears, imagine preferring to skate with a stick than with a woman!"

:bow: :bow: :bow:



At our rink the hockey players are also very... well hockey playerish. They got off my back once they realized I wasn't one of the normal figure skaters who scream if they get showered in ice shavings and watched me take one hard fall after another in a row. Still they'll make sexist comments to me and stuff. I really am gonna take some of the lines from this topic and modify them a bit to get snappy with them :D

[Rob Dean]

I think your best bet is to have the kid do other things than skating as well, be athletic overall, so that he just is a really high jumper and can show figure skating for the force effort it takes and not so much being the prima ballerina.

I got tied up on other things last night and wasn't able to add comments directly from my son. However, Sessy's comment here was one of his points--he thinks it helps that he's good at other athletics in gym class (though more in the track and field line than in the ball sports line). As far as the rest of it goes, his comments are the usual good advice that add up to "develop a thick skin, don't let other people set your agendas, find friends that accept you the way you are", etc.

A side line; yes, as far as rink popularity goes, he's gotten used to the enquiring comments from parents of prospective dance partners (and he's working on the dance test levels as well as his freestyle, at about 1:3), but it isn't his priority at the moment.

Rob

[xxcharxx]

there are many boys who skate for fun so all your son is doing "rong" is being better then them there just geolous plus when hes a bit older it will become a big pluss to him to be in a sport that more girls then boys take part in i know many boys who skate and most of them are better then me its like boys that do ballet well good for them i know its sort of a bit off subject but just sayin theres nothing wrong with iis as well as this somone mentoind getting him to make the other boys try what he can do this is a great idea it will boast his conferdence and shut them up

[sk8parent]

i must say when my son started to skate it was my husband who got most of the slack and rude comments. he always had a comeback of some rumour he heard about elvis S. kicking i think it was eric lindros' butt. well don't know how true that is but it shuts some of his coworkers up.

[CanadianAdult]

All Elvis has to do is girlieslap Eric aside the head and that's the end of Eric. At least his six or seven concussions has changed the mindset that concussions are just another hockey hit and that makes you tough. Elvis, man, his picture is next to "tough" in the dictionary.

I have a teen boy that skates recreationally. Axel, double sal, that sort of thing. He also has the best plus minus in the local hockey league. That speaks volumes, teasing is not an issue.

[sue123]

I wonder about the hockey players makign the rude comments. I would think by the time they get older, they know better and have respect for figure skaters. At least, teh kids on my cousin's hockey team do. He plays for one of the top teams in NY and once he was past the age of 13 or so, he stopped making rude remarks. His team as well, the guys are respectful. They do thier thing, the figure skaters do their thing. They are usually hard core training that they don't really care what any figure skater, male or otherwise, is doing.

IMO unexperienced opinion, I would let the sons develop a thick skin early on. Tell them it doesn't matter what other people think, only what they think, and have them have some snappy comebacks. Of course, I don't have any kids, but I remember kids teasing me when I was younger, but I guess I must have had a pretty thick skin because none of it ever really bothered me.

[FSWer]

WHAT!!!!!! Please tell whoever is saying or doing that to have a look a skating Partnerships,or go jump in the lake!!!!!!!

[southernsk8er]

My boyfriend used to compete nationally in junior pairs, and he's mentioned the teasing he got at school or from hockey players. To the school kids he brought up that he got to hang out with (and date) beautiful girls. Or he would point out that he could lift 100 pounds over his head with one hand. To the hockey players he said something along the lines of "I can skate fast AND spin AND do triple jumps - WITHOUT padding and helmets." He said that shut them up. Otherwise, he just ignored people, as he's pretty thick-skinned and got used to it over the years.