so I was wondering...

[Mercedeslove]

Is it bad to feel like you should quit when you are ahead?

So my ice show is this weekend and I ran into one of the young kids who would skate in the class before mine. Gamma/Delta. A year later she is FS 5 and working on her axle. A major milestone in a skaters career. I'm happy for her, she's a cute kid and her mom rocks.

I however, a year later, am only in FS 1 and working on...welll not the axel. Heck I can hardly spin.

I know adults don't move as fast as kids, but at 28 shouldn't I be moving faster then FS1. Am I wrong to be happy for this girl, yet be a little mad because I feel like I suck?

Does anyone else have this problem or am I being emo?

[peanutskates]

I don't think it's wrong; in fact, I do understand where your jealousy is coming from. As long as you don't let even a hint of it show with the girl. Myself and a skating friend have two "friends" each who started skating even before us, yet now me and my friend are ahead of them. They are dying of jealousy, whispering about us for half of their lesson (which is going to help them progress more, NOT). anyway:

it is a normal reaction, but unless you constantly feel bad when you go skating and it never makes you happy, I don't think you should quit. Skate for yourself, and set your own goals. Don't pay attention to anyone else - sure they might be ahead of you, but maybe you're just perfecting your skills more.

Besides, 28? You've still got a LOT of skating years left. Just be patient. If you want to progress more, try some more off-ice exercises, or maybe talk to your coach, who could start teaching you elements of a higher level, which will help you progress in the lower level.

So don't worry, but try not to let this overshadow your skating.

[Rusty Blades]

I started skating last year at age 56 - talk about a "SLOW LEARNER"! I figure what the kiddies pick up in one lesson takes me a month (or more!) to learn but I am not skating because it is easy - I am skating because it IS a challenge and it DOESN'T come easy. If all I wanted was to be "good" at something, I'd pick something for which I have more natural talent - I have done that, and excelled, but I get greater reward from skating because it doesn't come easy! I skated my first-ever competition just over a month ago (the Adult Championships) and came in 4th in my group. The feeling of accomplishment from that FAR overshadowed all the other championships and trophies from the other things I have done, the ones that come easier.

[skaternum]

If you're over the age of 18, you must NEVER compare yourself with a kid. NEVER. Look at it this way ... in 1 year, you've come further than I did in a year, and I started at the age of almost 31. Cut yourself some slack. Do you enjoy skating? If so, keep at it. All throughout your skating life, you'll encounter people who will learn faster than you, regardless of age. It's not a competition; it's a hobby.

[Sessy]

If you're asking yourself this question, it could mean you're in the wrong sport. Skating should bring joy, if not only joy, then at least for the most part. And yeah occasionally I'm jealous of other people's spins too, but that passes quickly, as soon as I start skating instead of watching really, I completely forget all jealousy (I think jealousy is more of a parents' disease than really a skaters' disease at our club at least).

Anyway if you can't really jump and can't really spin, your balance probably isn't very good, but perhaps you have incredible stamina and muscle strength and you're secretly a very good cross country skiier/speedskater/runner. Or maybe your hand-eye coordination is very good (mine is very bad for example) and you could be great at ball sports. Maybe you're not strong at all, and you don't have very good hand-eye coordination, but you're very artistic and graceful and got a very loose, movable body, then you could try ballroom dance or latin dance.

Now if these suggestions make you go like "But I love SKATING", then you know you're in the RIGHT sport for you, no matter if you're not progressing as quickly as others are.

However, if the suggestions don't make you protest on the inside, you should try finding an other sport, one you are good at and which you'll love because you're good at it. Just keep in mind there's always going to be people better than you.

[Isk8NYC]

Am I wrong to be happy for this girl, yet be a little mad because I feel like I suck?I've seen students of mine soar after my LTS class, usually because the parents finally decided that spending money on privates and practice was a good idea. You didn't tell us if this kid learned an axel through group lessons, but I doubt that's the case. She's probably taking private lessons once or twice a week and skating 2-3 practices weekly. Are you doing this, too?

You're comparing apples to oranges. Don't. FWIW, I think you've made great progress: Beta - FS1 in under a year. As peanutskates said, you've still got a LOT of skating years left.

[Sessy]

If you're over the age of 18, you must NEVER compare yourself with a kid. NEVER. .

Well I compare myself to the kids, but I do have to train more than the kids to get the same results and use the lessons more effectively than they do - stay focused all the time, while they can occasionally play a game or something. I just take that as part of the equation, that I've got to work say twice as hard as they do because I'm 10 years older than they are. If I were 20 years older, I'd probably have to work like four times more than they do. 's All part of the equation.
Either you accept the equation and you work with it (meaning you either accept you make less progress - which is unacceptable for me - or you put more hours into it), or you don't accept the equation and you find a different sport. But there's no changing the equation.

[jp1andOnly]

Sessy, sorry to break it to you but adults sometimes will never achieve what kids do. For example, many kids are naturally flexible. This is because children's bones are more flexible and supple. Adults are not. Many adults can't and no matter how much training will be able to do beillman's as adult joints and bones are not as supple and flexible. The older you get, the harder things are. So if i took your equation, you are saying that an adult of say 65 should be pushing themselves say 5 times than a child and still be able to acheive the same outcome. I think not.


Well I compare myself to the kids, but I do have to train more than the kids to get the same results and use the lessons more effectively than they do - stay focused all the time, while they can occasionally play a game or something. I just take that as part of the equation, that I've got to work say twice as hard as they do because I'm 10 years older than they are. If I were 20 years older, I'd probably have to work like four times more than they do. 's All part of the equation.
Either you accept the equation and you work with it (meaning you either accept you make less progress - which is unacceptable for me - or you put more hours into it), or you don't accept the equation and you find a different sport. But there's no changing the equation.

[Sessy]

Yeah okay but while flexibility will earn you some points, but the real point-makers are the spins and jumps which don't need a lot of flexibility (not counting the bielman, which most men for example can't do anyway). And you probably won't learn doubles if you start at 65 indeed, but then that's because the equation of how much more you need to train than a kid may be like a 100 times more or so. It grows exponentially with age I think.

[Emberchyld]

If you're over the age of 18, you must NEVER compare yourself with a kid. NEVER. Look at it this way ... in 1 year, you've come further than I did in a year, and I started at the age of almost 31. Cut yourself some slack. Do you enjoy skating? If so, keep at it. All throughout your skating life, you'll encounter people who will learn faster than you, regardless of age. It's not a competition; it's a hobby.

And remember, to the people clinging to the walls in public skate, you look like a pro. Every time I feel like I'm behind or slow, I remind myself of where I was only a year ago, or only a month ago.

Yes, you're not a little kid. Kids don't break as easily, are closer to the ground with less mass, and can pick things up much faster than adults in general. But you are amazing in your own way:

Give yourself a break-- most adults won't even TRY skating and you're in FS1! (seriously, how many of your coworkers and friends can do what you do on the ice?) In a few months, years, or decades, you'll be doing an axel. Until then, just enjoy the ride-- and the awesome muscles and beauty and strength that come with it.

[blackmanskating]

Is it bad to feel like you should quit when you are ahead?

So my ice show is this weekend and I ran into one of the young kids who would skate in the class before mine. Gamma/Delta. A year later she is FS 5 and working on her axle. A major milestone in a skaters career. I'm happy for her, she's a cute kid and her mom rocks.

I however, a year later, am only in FS 1 and working on...welll not the axel. Heck I can hardly spin.

I know adults don't move as fast as kids, but at 28 shouldn't I be moving faster then FS1. Am I wrong to be happy for this girl, yet be a little mad because I feel like I suck?

Does anyone else have this problem or am I being emo?

Nah I don't think it's emotional at all. Everybody hits a plateau sometime. FS 1 may be your plateau. I'm pretty sure everyone on this site isn't where they want to be. I know I'm not and I still feel that way even though people tell me that I am ahead of the game. I would focus on my accomplishments, not my shortcomings. Sit down and talk to your coach about your goals and make a plan on how to acheive them. Then set smaller attainable goals. You may just need to organize and structure your goals for skating. I wouldn't throw in the towel especially if you really enjoy it. Stick with it. It will be that much better when you move to FS 2. Okay, I'm getting off my soap box now. :)

BlackManSkating

[froggy]

I really hear you, I've seen the same thing many times, what others have said is very true adult skating beginners and kids are very very difft with few exceptions. I've been working on my sit spin for over a year already and one day I saw a kid learning the sit for the first time and she got it just like that! she must of done maybe like 5 revolutions! It was such a shock to my system, jealous, yup. I began skating at 24 and the first year i spent so much time just working on my ability to skate on 1 foot! I've been skating 2 1/2 years and much progress occured the last year, I'm finally getting my few single jumps more consistently and better stroking and scratch spins etc. Youll see there will be months that go with very little visible progress and then you'll jump and gain a lot of skills. and as much as you can do, you look like a professional to the skaters who are recreational. think back to just a year ago and im sure youll realize how far you have come. I dont know how often you train on ice and take lessons which all play a big factor as well as your phyiscal health and if you have any fears of falling.

enjoy the journey!

[fmh]

I feel your pain! Last summer I grew 4 inches and when I came back, I lost all my jumps. so here I was with about 3 years of double jumps consistantly landed and then they were gone like that. I almost quit, other kids who I remember as the "little kids" were doing the same things as me. That was when I decided that it didnt matter what everyone else was doing. It matters what I'm doing and when I got my jumps back they were better than ever, probably you will be slower to get your stuff. but once you get it, It will rock!

[doubletoe]

I agree that you cannot compare your rate of progress to that of kids (I have finally started to get over that tendency myself). First of all, kids' brains and bodies are still in the "sponge" phase where they are programmed to build new neural pathways and learn new things really quickly. Second, they have the time and energy to skate twice as many hours a week as you do.
Instead, try looking at your progress as a percentage of your lifetime. I'm sure that in 10% of your lifetime, you can master the same skills a 10-year old can master in 10% of her lifetime, so you are really learning at the same pace.
Also, just think. . . Those who end up being the best skaters are those who just stick with it. Someone who is ahead of you now may quit skating next year, so a few years from now you'll be doing all sorts of stuff she couldn't do when she was skating (not to mention once she has stopped skating!).

[miraclegro]

Well, if it makes ya feel any better, i found a cassete tape labeled FS4 program and it was dated 2001. Well, it' snow 2007 and that seems pretty sorry. But in 2001, i had to drive over an hour to any rink and could only practice 2x week for about an hour each. Now i have a rink nearby and practice 4-5 times a week, and am STILL at FS4, but am MUCH better. I have achieved my Adult Silver MIF since then, so i know i have improved. All i need now is my axel and i'll be FS5. So, as long as you know you are making progress, don't beat yourself up.

Enjoy the journey.

[doubletoe]

Sessy, sorry to break it to you but adults sometimes will never achieve what kids do. For example, many kids are naturally flexible. This is because children's bones are more flexible and supple. Adults are not. Many adults can't and no matter how much training will be able to do beillman's as adult joints and bones are not as supple and flexible. The older you get, the harder things are. So if i took your equation, you are saying that an adult of say 65 should be pushing themselves say 5 times than a child and still be able to acheive the same outcome. I think not.

It's true that the chances of ever landing a triple jump are pretty slim if you start as an adult, but there are so many things we adults can do if we just stick with it and don't limit ourselves. I was never able to do the splits when I was young, but I now stretch diligently 5 days a week, and at 42 years old, I finally did the splits this year for the first time in my life. Also, in the past year I learned 3-4 new spirals with the goal of achieving a level 4 spiral sequence, and actually achieved it (and it didn't even require a Biellmann or a full split spiral, neither of which I can do, but I won't say "never!").

[looplover]

I was never able to do the splits when I was young, but I now stretch diligently 5 days a week, and at 42 years old, I finally did the splits this year for the first time in my life. .

Ooh that's good to know. I've always had poor flexibility, even as a kid - so this means there's hope if I'm willing to do the work :)

[SynchroSk8r114]

I do not think there's anything wrong with the way you feel. While I am working on landing some of my doubles, it's frustrating to see kids that are 8 or 9 years old working on and landing the same jumps and spins I am. But I'm 21, have been skating for nearly 13 years, have passed my Senior MIF and am working on my Pre-Gold dances, and in some areas have more experience that these younger skaters. But honestly, I respect and admire the talent that these kids share. I wish that at 8 or 9 I could skate as well as they can, but at that age, I was only beginning.

Over the years I have struggled with feeling like I was going nowhere at times, too...that I was too old. But I've accepted that everyone works at their own pace and I'm thankful that I have two wonderful coaches that feel the same way too. My best advice is to worry about yourself - try setting personal goals and try as hard as you can not to compare yourself to other skaters. It only brings you down. Forming a support team with other adult skaters may help too...just knowing that others are experiencing the same ups and downs as you.

Although I'm not in your same situation, I hope this helps! :)

[Petlover]

Do you truly enjoy skating? If so, stick with it. I have been skating for 10 years, started at age 43. The kids and some of the adults seem to fly by me in skill, level, and elements, but at ISI FS3 and Dance 3, I am really happy. It takes me a lot longer to learn and perfect my skating, but that makes the accomplishments much sweeter! It's also fun for me to see the kids grow and improve their skating.

[badaxel]

I used to have the same problem with comparing myself, and I would get so jealous that I didn't start as a kid, too. Then I rationalized, well, there are huge benefits to being an adult skater. There's no race against time before I get too old and have to go to college. Most of the kids will never make it to nationals, but I got to go this year, and it was amazing. For a kid to be doing doubles is really not that outstanding- there are so many that can do it. But, for an adult, it is really something. To me, an axel for an adult learner is the equivalent to a double axel for a kid- it's when you've really, truly hit a high level. Doubles for us are like triples to them. See where you are on the continuum, and then you can compare. Let the disagreeing begin...