Is it me or....?

[Black Sheep]

For the past three years or so, it seems that, at the rinks I've skated at regularly, there is always one person--always an adult--that treats everybody at the rink like their best friend except me. They will not even say "Hello" to me--they jsut completely ignore me. If that adult is a skater, they will completely ignore my right-of-way when I'm running through a program. I make every effor to steer clear of them, but they always sneak up behind me and give me dirty looks like I got in their way on purpose. Having to deal with people who hate/ignore me without explaining why makes it really hard to skate at all!

[doubletoe]

For the past three years or so, it seems that, at the rinks I've skated at regularly, there is always one person--always an adult--that treats everybody at the rink like their best friend except me. They will not even say "Hello" to me--they jsut completely ignore me. If that adult is a skater, they will completely ignore my right-of-way when I'm running through a program. I make every effor to steer clear of them, but they always sneak up behind me and give me dirty looks like I got in their way on purpose. Having to deal with people who hate/ignore me without explaining why makes it really hard to skate at all!

It sounds like you probably just need to exude more confidence when you're on the ice. Even if you don't really feel confident, fake it until you feel it, and *own* the ice when it's your music playing. Yell, "Program!" as you approach that person who never moves out of your way, and stay on course so that person has to move.

[Black Sheep]

It sounds like you probably just need to exude more confidence when you're on the ice. Even if you don't really feel confident, fake it until you feel it, and *own* the ice when it's your music playing. Yell, "Program!" as you approach that person who never moves out of your way, and stay on course so that person has to move.

That's something I've been working on more, and I think I'm getting better at it. Sometimes, it's fun to shout out a cheery "Hi!" as I skate by. ;)

[VegasGirl]

No, it's not just you... seems to be universal truth that there always is atleast one but usually quite a few absolute jerks at every rink!

[thadine]

Well, sometimes people are not as friendly with each other as you may think. You may think they're saying hi to everyone but you, but maybe they're actually only friendly to a couple of people they know, and you're not noticing the heaps of peple other than yourself that they are not noticing?
On a side note, I am always being ignored in general, and it can be quite frustrating. Standing in line at the checkout queue, and people just go and stand in front of me, or worse still, sitting on a bench, and people just come up and site ON TOP of me. I swear I'm not invisible, but somehow... :frus: I just decided to appreciate the people who are nice and friendly, rather than to be annoyed with the people who aren't :D

[beachbabe]

are you sure you didnt do anything to offend the person?

also, could it be that they are not doing it on purpose. I've had some friends think i was ignoring them a few times because sometimes when i skate I am so mentally in it- that i seem a little spaced out but I'm just so focused on my skating that I might not acknowledge people unless they are in the way when i'm doing my program.

some people do seem a little spaced out when they are doing a run through so it might not be nothing to do with you.

[flippet]

For the past three years or so, it seems that, at the rinks I've skated at regularly, there is always one person--always an adult--that treats everybody at the rink like their best friend except me. They will not even say "Hello" to me--they jsut completely ignore me. If that adult is a skater, they will completely ignore my right-of-way when I'm running through a program. I make every effor to steer clear of them, but they always sneak up behind me and give me dirty looks like I got in their way on purpose. Having to deal with people who hate/ignore me without explaining why makes it really hard to skate at all!

Perhaps you need to make the effort to befriend this person. It's not just her responsibility.

If her behavior bugs you--talk to her about it. If you're not willing to do your half of the work of fixing the problem, then you don't have much place to complain about it.

If you've talked to her about it and it's still going on, well then, you'll just have to suck it up and take the high road. Some people haven't quite 'grown up' yet---we all encounter them. You learn to either deal, or avoid. Take your pick.

[doubletoe]

also, could it be that they are not doing it on purpose. I've had some friends think i was ignoring them a few times because sometimes when i skate I am so mentally in it- that i seem a little spaced out but I'm just so focused on my skating that I might not acknowledge people unless they are in the way when i'm doing my program.

some people do seem a little spaced out when they are doing a run through so it might not be nothing to do with you.

Whenever I thought someone was purposely ignoring me, it always turned out to be one of these two things:
(1) That person was just caught up in her own thoughts and it had absolutely nothing to do with me, OR
(2) I had not been careful about getting out of that person's way and I came across as not caring (when in fact, I just didn't realize it!)

[Sonic]

I'm quite shy and find it difficult to make friends - and am a bit of a softie, so often overreact to people's behaviour. With skating, I've found that what doubletoe suggested works for me - try and exude confidence.

For example, on about the third week back after my 18 year break, I was at the evening session after our LTS class, and decided to venture into the middle of the rink where all the 'good' skaters were and try out a few pathetic waltz jumps etc. I smiled at the 'good' skaters as if I was one of them, and they all reacted positively, came up to chat.

A good way to break the ice (excuse the pun! :roll: lol!) is to compliment someone on a move - e.g. 'Say I wish I could do that, any tips?' - most people feel flattered when asked for advice (I certainly do!) Another good time is when you're taking skates off...'Gawd the ice was bad tonight, don't you thing...'

So yeah, you could try something like the above to get to know this person, if it doesn't work and she's still 'off' with you, ignore her, probably not worth bothering with.

S xx

[Award]

I make every effor to steer clear of them, but they always sneak up behind me and give me dirty looks like I got in their way on purpose. Having to deal with people who hate/ignore me without explaining why makes it really hard to skate at all!

You have to assess his age and mentality. Or maybe try to figure out whether he or she got a misunderstanding at one stage. Like, sometimes when we're doing figure exercises, we don't always realise that we're blocking somebody or skating across their path, or whatever it is. Whatever is that case, for him or her to keep skating up to you and giving you dirty looks, or to try to intimidate or stalk you is not acceptable. So just ignore him or her for the time being. And if it persists, maybe you can ask him or her about his behaviour. And if he doesn't explain, just tell a rink staff that you might know or trust.

[samba]

Its not just ice rinks, put it this way do you like everyone you meet? You just cant please all the people all of the time if you try to befriend this person and it doesnt work then move on, its his/her loss the idea of this game is to destroy your self-esteem and no-one is worth that.