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View Full Version : Daughter had a bad fall and is now scared


jebnolte
11-01-2005, 05:36 PM
My 4 year old daughter is taking skating lessons and she LOVED it until she fell and landed on top of another child's skate. She wasn't badly hurt, just bruised up a bit, but she is now VERY skiddish. Before this incident, she was marching around the ice really good and would even glide. She was progressing very well, but now she goes out there and pretty much just stands in one place. She will glide a little bit, but will not pick her blades up off the ice. She says she is not scared, but I know she is.

My question is, has anyone been through this with their child or student and if so, what did you do to get them over it? I don't want her to give up because of one bad fall.

Help!
Julie

dbny
11-01-2005, 07:19 PM
That's rotten luck. I teach tots and I have seen the occasional one get scared off by a bad fall. The best thing is to prevent such falls, but of course, that isn't always possible. You know your daughter better than anyone. What is her general reaction to getting hurt and to sudden enexpected events? Some kids will not do anything that might result in a fall. If she is not generally put off by such things, then you have an excellent chance of helping her have fun on the ice again.

Whatever you do, don't push her. She has to decide whether or not she wants to risk falling like that again. I'm sure she must have fallen other times, so you could also talk with her about it, and point out that most falls are not so bad. Is her class large, so that it's easy for the kids to fall over each other. I know that sometimes even a few kids in a whole rink can manage that anyway, but I don't like to see tots in classes larger than about six or seven. One thing I do with scared tots is play ball with them. I use a plush ball that won't roll much. This gets them to let go and to go after the ball when they miss the catch. If you can't do that with her yourself, you could get her a few short private lessons; twenty minutes is enough for a four year old. Make sure you have a coach who understands the problem and who will play with her on the ice.

Let us know how it goes.

Tennisany1
11-02-2005, 05:25 PM
My daughter has had a number of bad falls in the last 2 years. So far, she has always gone back out. Sometimes it takes a hug and cuddle from me and sometimes just a smile and a wave. I'm not sure if our talks about falls and what they mean have helped at all, but I'll tell you what we do and maybe you can use some of it.

We talk a lot about falling. How "falling just means you are trying something tricky." (I've actually now heard her explaining this to other little kids!) That it is okay to fall because that is how you learn. I know it can hurt (she kids me because I am a chicken on the ice because I don't want to fall) but I am always there to give her a hug. Most importantly that she always has a choice about whether or not to skate.

I don't know if that kind of discussion might lessen your daughter's worry or not. I also agree a private lesson or two if you can do it would probably really help.

Good luck,

Oh, another point. If she is not wearing knee and elbow pads you might want to try them. I found they really made the skating more enjoyable.

dbny
11-02-2005, 08:19 PM
Oh, another point. If she is not wearing knee and elbow pads you might want to try them. I found they really made the skating more enjoyable.

If you do get knee pads, make sure they are the soft ones, not the ones intended for inline skating. It can be hard to find soft knee pads in extra small, but they are much better shock absorbers and well worth it.

Isk8NYC
11-04-2005, 11:33 AM
Does she have friends who like to skate? If so, you can plan a little outing or two to skate together. Having friends around tends to distract them from their fears, goad them into trying harder, and encourage them to be brave. Most importantly, it's fun!

Blosmbubbs
11-04-2005, 09:26 PM
I have taught tons of tots and not all of them want to go out and skate. My suggestion would be to bribe them with a toy or stickers, etc. I always tell them who ever is good today gets a sticker and they will try their hardest. If not the teacher could just skate holding her in front or holding her hand until she gets the hang of it again. :)

jebnolte
11-08-2005, 10:20 AM
She is back!!!! YAY!!!! I went out on the ice with her after her fall and all she wanted to do was get off the ice b/c she was scared of falling. I was frustrated so I said OK, we will go home. We got off the ice and she acually cried to get back on. She told me she wanted to just go out there and stand. I thought this was a little strange, but I went with it. We went out there and she content by just standing there. Then I started to think........she probably isn't having fun because I am trying to teach her to skate and the last thing she wants is for her Mommy, who is always telling her what to do off the ice, invade on what is fun for her and tell her what to do ON the ice. So, I came up with a plan............There were very few people skating, I had two shoe laces in my skate bag and there were letters on the ice (Atlanta Ice Forum was written under the ice) I made up a game where she would take one string and put the string on a letter and then put the other one on another letter. I would then say "Oh no! The string is crying, he wants to be on the letter L not the A anymore! You better hurry up and go get him and put him on the letter L so he will stop crying!" (Sounds cheesy I know, but my 4 year old has a HUGE imagination!!) She got so excited and pretty much ran over to the string and picked it up herself and marched over to put the string on the L. Then she said "Do you hear it Mama? The other string is crying, he want's to be on the letter T"............and that is all it took, we played the game for 1 hour and she was all over the ice going from letter to letter. Not only did this game help her to "skate" without being scared, it taught her how to glide while in a squating position when she picked up the strings (which she would never do if you asked her to) and on top of that, she was learning her letters :) We killed 3 birds with one stone with that game. I never told her she was "skating" b/c I didn't want to ruin it. I will say though, she is still scared of falling, but atleast she will acually get on the ice and move now and has so much fun doing it.

Thanks again for everyone's advice,
Julie

CanAmSk8ter
11-12-2005, 04:51 PM
I was laughing through that whole post, but hey, whatever works! Glad you were able to solve the problem.

BelleOnIce
11-13-2005, 11:46 AM
Glad she is back on the ice now!
I take my 3 year old niece on skating and she was doing well march with me and occasionally going a bit herself.
Then she had a fall, it wasn't bad or serious but gave her a fright so she didn't want to go back on.
I didn't make her go back on but then after a while she seen me skating and wanted to come on.
When she did though she was terrified of me letting go so my coach and I just worked on getting her marching with us and then told her about the "magic string"
We demonstated how when I needed to stand straighter and not fall my coach would stand behind me and hold me up by pulling at the invisible magic string. Soon she wanted to try herself and is now marching around the ice and gliding away and telling everyone it is because of her magic string.
Since she has even fallen again but instead of wanting to go off she told me off for not holding the magic string tight enough!
I think it is really important not too push and instead to use fun and imaginative games like the one jebnolte used!
Think I will use that one next time I take her on as I think she is probably fed up with mraching up and down straight lines!!

Belle

Schmeck
11-13-2005, 12:15 PM
jebnolte, I'm glad your daughter got back into skating, but it's really not wise to put things on the ice, even if few people are skating. Sometimes even the fibers left over from a mitten on the ice can make it unsafe (especially when it's the really fuzzy mittens the kids seem to love!)

My daughter is an ace at getting the little ones to skate in her basic skills group (snowplow sam1) They play red light green light, simon says, etc.