Special Students

[Isk8NYC]

Several students' parents have confided in me that their child is either learning disabled or diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder. I'm glad they told me, so I don't get too frustrated with the wandering and poor behavior. I'm also glad that they're spread out over the eleven groups I teach each week. The kid has a problem, how do I deal with it?

I coached Special Olympics skaters years ago, so I use some of the techniques I learned from that group. Plus, I'm hard-nosed and consistent about discipline for pushing and throwing snow. But, I'm worried that the sitution is very different. Down's Syndrome and Autism is not the same thing as I'm dealing with now. Frankly, the Special Olympics' kids were fun to teach and wanted to learn. These kids are a real handful.

Any suggestions?

[twinkle]

The key to dealing with ADHD children is fairness. If you are fair they will respect you, but if they feel you are picking on them more than others they will misbehave even more.

They also need some time to digest information, so suggest that they do something and give it a while before reminding them.

[WeBeEducated]

The key to working with kids who are identified as ADHD, etc., is to realize that the parents ususally have tolerated and accepted bad behavior for years, and the kid knows it.
When these kids want to behave I have seen them behave without any of the classic "symptoms". When they are bored, challenged, frustrated they have learned that they are allowed to become rude and aggressive. I think their parents and our society is giving them permission to act in ill mannered, anti social ways that limit their emotional progress. As far as I am concerned, they are simply kids who have had bad parenting, parents who do not know how to set consistant limits and be warm and loving all at the same time. They give in to their kids every whim, including aggression and tantrums and expect you to do the same. When their child is rude they expect you and the world to find an excuse for the rudeness. They look for faults in your teaching, rather than at their parenting or their childs personality. So remember, the kids are EXPECTING you to give their every whim 110% of your time, while you are forced to ignore the other , emotionally stable, well behaved children in the group.Their parents are also expecting you to adapt to the anti social, agressive, selfish behavior of their child at the expense of the group.
In other words...understand that you will NEVER please the kid or his parents.
Teach the class and if the ADD kid wants to draw negative attention to himself ignore him completely.
If they drop out, fine.
Go on to the next group of well adjusted children or true special education children who can be a joy to work with, and enjoy the rewards.
With the ADD kid and his family, it is nothing but constant headaches and their unrealistic expectations.

[twinkle]

Your post shows that you know nothing about ADHD and how it affects children.
It is true that some children are too readily diagnosed with ADHD without proper investigation into other causes of their behaviour such as poor parenting.

However, I take serious issue with your assertion that the only reason ADHD children misbehave is that their parents have allowed them to.

It is possible (and I have firsthand experience of this), for 1 child of a family to be very well behaved and 'normal', and the other to be ADHD.
ADHD has nothing to do with the child not wanting to behave, they know what they are doing is wrong but can't control themselves. Can you imagine how helpless that must make them feel???

Sorry for the long off topic post, but I couldn't allow such an ignorant post to go unchallenged.

[Elsy2]

One of my kids was considered borderline ADHD, due to their difficulty paying attention unless spoken to very directly. The coach, and teachers realized that they had to get this child's eye contact in order to be sure of the child's attention.

So I bring this suggestion to this thread....if you have difficulty getting the child to focus on what you are saying, be sure you make eye contact and have their full attention.

[WeBeEducated]

Originally posted by twinkle
Your post shows that you know nothing about ADHD and how it affects children.
It is true that some children are too readily diagnosed with ADHD without proper investigation into other causes of their behaviour such as poor parenting.

However, I take serious issue with your assertion that the only reason ADHD children misbehave is that their parents have allowed them to.

It is possible (and I have firsthand experience of this), for 1 child of a family to be very well behaved and 'normal', and the other to be ADHD.
ADHD has nothing to do with the child not wanting to behave, they know what they are doing is wrong but can't control themselves. Can you imagine how helpless that must make them feel???

Sorry for the long off topic post, but I couldn't allow such an ignorant post to go unchallenged.

Sorry, but I have worked with ADHD kids for years, attended numerous seminars, particpated in frequent information sessions, etc.
Parents of ADHD kids share common traits that I have witnessed for years, and I do feel they have contributed significantly to the child's lack of emotional growth.
Not one had a parent who didnt expect superhuman patience in dealing with their ill behaved child. Not one had a parent who didnt stand there while the kid was kicking them in the shins and just whine "now Johnny...you must be tired". That is always their classic response to it...the kid is "tired".
These parents negotiate with their kids constantly, giving the kid the power to extend every argument into more attention getting marathons. Usually with the ADHD kids the kids are in control of their parents. When they come up against adults who arent willing to play their game, the kids act out and become rude and aggressive. When they want to "pay attention" and focus on their video games, they have no trouble at all! So I do not believe they struggle with concentration and focusing on a task. They do a fine job with the things that interest them, like TV, video games, etc., and act like impulsive brats when the task is unpleasant or difficult.
We used to call that "spoiled".

[w.w.west]

Originally posted by WeBeEducated
Sorry, but I have worked with ADHD kids for years, attended numerous seminars, particpated in frequent information sessions, etc.
Parents of ADHD kids share common traits that I have witnessed for years, and I do feel they have contributed significantly to the child's lack of emotional growth.
Not one had a parent who didnt expect superhuman patience in dealing with their ill behaved child. Not one had a parent who didnt stand there while the kid was kicking them in the shins and just whine "now Johnny...you must be tired". That is always their classic response to it...the kid is "tired".
These parents negotiate with their kids constantly, giving the kid the power to extend every argument into more attention getting marathons. Usually with the ADHD kids the kids are in control of their parents. When they come up against adults who arent willing to play their game, the kids act out and become rude and aggressive. When they want to "pay attention" and focus on their video games, they have no trouble at all! So I do not believe they struggle with concentration and focusing on a task. They do a fine job with the things that interest them, like TV, video games, etc., and act like impulsive brats when the task is unpleasant or difficult.
We used to call that "spoiled".

It is attitudes like this that cause so much misconception of special needs children today. ADHD or any other developmental disability for that matter is not a result of bad parenting, contrary to what those seminars or informational sessions taught you or what you interpreted them to say.

To Isk8NYC: Kudos to you for wanting to help Special Needs children! Give these children lots of eye contact, encouragement and most of all let them know that you believe in them! This isn't to say that you should treat them differently or give them any other special treatment otherwise. Just let them grow and BELIEVE IN THEM just as you would believe in any other child! You may not get immediate response, but trust me, accomplishments come in all shapes and sizes. A precious smile can brighten a day to no end, both from the child and the teacher! Keep up the good work!

[twinkle]

Originally posted by WeBeEducated

We used to call that "spoiled".

8O 8O 8O 8O 8O

I'm lost for words.
It is people with these sentiments who make the lives of these children a misery. With fair treatment they can learn to behave well.

And how do you explain the fact that one child of a family is ADHD and the other isn't. They have had exactly the same treatment, how can one be "spoiled" and the other completely well-adjusted???

How can someone so opinionated, judgmental and unsympathetic be allowed to work with children at all?

[Mrs Redboots]

To be absolutely fair, sometimes what is diagnosed as ADHD is actually the result of poor teaching, or of poor expectations of the child. Other times, perhaps most frequently, it can be the result of food allergies. My own nephews and nieces were prime examples of this - perfectly normal and well-behaved unless they were allowed to eat chocolate or drink cola, whereupon they turned into little monsters. The youngest still does, but the others are outgrowing the tendency.

And, of course, sometimes it is far worse than that, and can't be controlled by diet or by behaviour modification. But I'm afraid that it is over-diagnosed, which is very hard luck on those children who genuinely are ill!

As for how to deal with them - just like any other child! Don't reward poor behaviour, but heap on the praise and attention when they make an effort to do what they're asked. And have a couple of strategies up your sleeve for new games if boredom sets in!

[blue111moon]

I've taught 4-year olds to skate for more than 15 years and I've lost count of the parents who have told me their child requires special treatment. But there's only one child I remember consciously catering to - she was partly deaf and had to be looking at me to understand instructions. We made it a point to tap her on the helmet when we needed her to look at us, although she was really good about doing that anyway.

For dealing with the rest, I found that it was best to teach them the same as everyone else. In group lessons, that's all you can do. 90% of the kids were fine and just followed right along with everyone else. The very few who didn't, well, it's a GROUP lesson and group is all the parent is paying for. If the child cannot function within the group or cannot learn in a group setting, then the school director politely explains that private lessons might be better.

[mary]

Sounds like the perfect solution to me.

[WeBeEducated]

If it is group lessons and the child is incapable of or chosses not to behave, then I would suggest private lessons so that the positive dynamics of the group of cooperative children is preserved.
My experience with parents of ADHD children though is that the moment you tell them that their child is too disruptive for group lessons(or a normal classroom) they begin to make excuses, demands, and complaints. They ususally dont take the news very well, and their lack of cooperation filters all the way down to the child. Instead of removing the disruptive (also often rude and aggressive) child from the group the parents begin a laundry list of things for you to do to accomodate their child.
I have witnessed an ADHD child stabbing an innocent child in the neck with a pencil only to hear the mother of the ADHD child say "he must have been tired".
I have seen an ADHD child choke and strangle a little girl who didnt give him the ball on the playground. The mother's response? "he must have been tired"
Recently I saw an ADHD child bite, kick, and scratch a teacher until she was bleeding because she wouldnt let him run out the door during one of his temper tantrums . The mothers casual response was " He must have been bored"
Trust me, it came as a shock to me to see these parents show a total lack of empathy to the other children who had been violated, and to show a total disregard to the teachers who have been kicked, hit and bit.
After seeing it in action for years I am weary of the ADHD kids and their parents.
My own son coaches and came home to tell me about an ADHD kid in group lessons who was calling all the other 8 year olds "A-holes", and was being rude and disrespectful to him. I advised him to warn him once, and if no drastic improvement is made, kick him out. The parent was full of excuses, but not helpful. He kicked him out the following week. Ordinary children, and children with Down's , etc., can be a joy to teach, but nobody should be forced to put up with the aggressively rude antics of the ADHD kids I have seen.

[CanAmSk8ter]

I had a class of 12 Basic 3/4 kids two years ago where one little boy (he was probably about 5 or 6) was clearly ADHD. Cute kid, but never doing what he had been asked (I'd tell the kids to show me their T-pushes and he'd push off with this vacant look and start doing forward swizzles) and could not stand still to save his life. Since the class was big, I'd often have to divide them into two groups to do something and have one group go at a time. This kid would go with the wrong group, he'd stand and stare into space or fiddle with his laces while his group went, he'd go with the wrong group and do the wrong skill, you name it. He was never disruptive or a behavior problem per se, he just needed...well, really what he needed was one-to-one coaching. I know the learn-to-skate director suggested it to his parents, but apparently they didn't go for it. Two of my friends ended up with him in their classes that year too, and I explained to them about ADHD and what I know from experience can work better than regular coaching tactics with some ADHD kids. (I want to emphasize some. I think part of why people are taking issue with WeBeEducated's posts is that he/she seems to think her experiences are hard-and-fast rules with ADHD kids. There's no doubt in my mind that there are ADHD kids who behave the way they do for the reasons she describes- I've taught some- but I've taught many more who are clearly trying to behave appropriately and just can't control their impulses. I'm not talking violent impulses, I'm talking things like cutting in line, calling names, not listening to directions, more run-of-the-mill ADHD stuff.) My little ADHD guy used to look so ashamed when I asked him, "What did I just ask you guys to do?" that I stopped asking him and just corrected him. I knew he wasn't listening, and I knew he wasn't purposefully tuning me out. He was doing what I've done in school pretty much all my life.

Anyway, the main things I found to help with this little guy were:
A)to make sure I had eye contact with him when giving directions

B) To give one or at most two directions at a time. Putting combinations of skills together didn't work well; he'd space out and forget what he was supposed to be doing long before he was finished. One-on-one it might have worked, since I'd have been able to give him prompts. But with 11 other kids to watch... not gonna happen

C) Someone else said this already, but make sure to praise them, both when they do a skill correctly and when they follow directions well. If you notice during a class that your skater is doing something fairly basic correctly, you might point it out to them quietly after class. I'd sometimes go up to my little guy and say quietly, "Nice job keeping your feet still today!" It might sound weird to the other kids to hear him praised for that, but I wanted to reinforce it however I could.

D) Keep in mind their short attention span. Don't do more than three or four repetitions of stuff. You can always go back and do it again later.

[WeBeEducated]

I consider it quite within the norm for young children to be easily distracted and easily confused by complex directions. As long as the child isnt aggressive, violent, and insulting to others in the group I am willing to accomodate his needs.
I do think such a child that regularly resorts to tantrums, stabbing, choking, and attacking others needs to learn it is anti social behavior. They need to see a consequence to their actions. Their parents often fail to see this. They coddle them and offer excuses.
In my experience with such children, the parents passively condone the behavior by expecting ohters to put up with it, and by their tone of indulgence toward the misbehaving child.

[dbny]

Originally posted by WeBeEducated
I consider it quite within the norm for young children to be easily distracted and easily confused by complex directions. As long as the child isnt aggressive, violent, and insulting to others in the group I am willing to accomodate his needs.
I do think such a child that regularly resorts to tantrums, stabbing, choking, and attacking others needs to learn it is anti social behavior. They need to see a consequence to their actions. Their parents often fail to see this. They coddle them and offer excuses.
In my experience with such children, the parents passively condone the behavior by expecting ohters to put up with it, and by their tone of indulgence toward the misbehaving child.

I've never heard that kind of behavior excused by ADHD. What I've heard a lot of is "he's such a boy!"

[w.w.west]

The original poster to this thread,Isk8NYC, came here asking for advice on how to deal with Special Students. The best advice by far has been by CanAmSk8ter. Yes, there will be some parents that behave as WeBeEducated has learned with her many, many experiences in dealing with these types of children. That is unfortunate especially for the child and other children involved. But we can't assume that all parents will behave this way. That is simply unfair. If the issue is strictly lack of attention, then that is one thing and can be improved with work. Obviously, if there is violent behaivor, then that is something totally different and it needs to be addressed and should not be tolerated. Not all children with the same diagnosis behave exactly the same way just as all normal/typical children do not behave exactly the same way. Everyone deserves a chance. I shutter to think where this world would be if nobody were afforded chances.

Isk8NYC, please update us on your teachings with your class. I am sincerely interested to know and am pulling for you!

[twinkle]

CanAmSk8ter, great post! 8-)

[Isk8NYC]

Thank you to CanAmSk8ter and everyone who gave me some great tips. I already do use a lot of eye contact and calling the kids by name specifically. (I'm getting better at remembering names!)

Eye contact is vita:I had a beginning swimmer who just didn't listen. One day, we were talking about the lane line that runs down the middle of the lane and she confessed that she couldn't see it when she swims, not even with her goggles on. I had a talk with the Mom, who said that her daughter wore very strong prescription glasses. They bought a pair of prescription goggles and the kid's listening skills improved dramatically, as did her swimming. Must be something to the line of "I can't hear you without my glasses."

I tried the "quiet praise" on one of my ADHD skating students and it really helped her pay attention. Maybe she's tired of hearing her name called out loud for bad things, she doesn't even listen anymore and didn't hear that I was praising her!

Thanks for all the tips and such. There are always different opinions about the same subject and it's okay to discuss them civilly with an open mind.

Feel free to add more attention-keeping ideas if you think of them.

[CanAmSk8ter]

I actually thought of another one that actually works well with all kids, but especially ones whose attention is hard to keep: use humor! They'll try harder to keep listening if they think you might say something funny. This actually works like a charm with the tot groups too.

[LilSk8er24]

I worked with a girl with ADD this past fall. I think if you're an instructor for a skating group, maybe you could assign a PA to that person. Be careful though...parents of special needs kids are just like any other parent. Some demand special attention, some would just rather not. ADD kids have trouble focusing so here are a few tips:
1. Encouragement is good...try working on a skill a few times, and give constructive feedback. Once she/he is bored, move on to something else and if time permits, come back to it later.
2. Make it fun and be creative. The girl I helped loved it when I would get her to try a new skill but I would put a bean bag on her head to help with balance (keeping the head up)
3. Little taps on the helmet will help them refocus.
4. One thing about ADD kids is that they are often very excited and bright children. Very fun to be around.
Autism:
Some can't tolerate being touched so talk to the parents about that. They won't look at you in the eye until they know you, but they're very rewarding to work with.
Treat them as they are. Treat an adult as you would treat an adult. Same with teens, kids, tots, etc
Good luck! Hope I helped a little
~lil

[dbny]

Originally posted by CanAmSk8ter
I actually thought of another one that actually works well with all kids, but especially ones whose attention is hard to keep: use humor! They'll try harder to keep listening if they think you might say something funny. This actually works like a charm with the tot groups too.

True! I remember last year when I worked with a boy who hardly ever looked at me and was generally dicombobulated, that if I could get him to laugh, then he did focus for a little while on what we were doing. I must remember to remember that!