Parents Parents Parents!

[Lutzgirl]

Dear me Parents how do they worry about there child!
And yes i know it is normal but really................maybe if you didnt worry about us so much the stress wouldnt become so bad !

BUT PARENTS I LUV YA after all we wouldnt be here withought you?

Any replies?

[Mrs Redboots]

Poor LutzGirl! I promise you, speaking as a Mum of someone who's now grown-up herself, we do get better as you get older, I promise you! My Mum is really nice now.....

If your Mum is stressing you out, why don't you try to persuade her to start skating?

All the same, my pet hates is parents who bully their children when they are on the ice.... there's a father at our rink who I try to avoid because he does just that.

[Lutzgirl]

that is teribble but thanks for the reply!
I am wishing upon a star :D:D

[Elsy2]

I never understood why my mom couldn't watch me doing sports (she left in the middle of my exhibition when I fell off the beam...) UNTIL I became a skatemom 8O

I was a mess of nerves prior to daughter's competitions, and the coach had to get me away from her, so I wouldn't pass on those nervous feelings. She finally convinced me to compete at the same competitions in adult class, and that would keep me worried about myself instead of her.

Some parents get better with time. I'd like to think that I learned quickly what to do and what not to do....but there are some parents who never get used to watching their kids. I know a few who leave the building....just can't watch at all.

I agree that skating myself has helped immensely to understand the whole competition process and all the stresses involved for the skater. I learned that elements come and go, and you just don't know what will happen until you are out there to perform. I've seen near miracles.....and tragic performances. I learned that confidence and your mental state is so important. But even so, overconfidence can be a liability too.

Sorry for rambling on...I'll just say we parents love you, we want you to do well, and we feel your pain when you don't. So, if a skateparent is driving you nuts prior to competition, get the coach to engage them in some other activity to get away from you! Coaches are good at that sort of thing.

[Lutzgirl]

Thankz alot Elsy2 ill kepp that in mind!

But one problem......my mom hates figure skating :(

[sk8ergirl]

Obsessive figure skating parents (usually moms} give our sport a bad reputation! Most should learn to chill out, the sooner they realize their little sally isnt going to make the olympics, the better of they would be!

[Elsy2]

I didn't think we were talking about obsessive skating parents here...just parents who unintentionally stress out their skater. The obsessive parent is another story!

[Lutzgirl]

well i am gonna talk 2 my mom and see if we can figure things out and if not then well i will rty my best with everyone elses support!

[NickiT]

I've got all this to come. I could barely watch my daughter skate in our club's spin, spiral and jump competition recently and when she fell on her spiral I didn't know which way to look! She did however skate extremely well and still won the bronze.

However she's coming up to being ready to take her Level 1 test now but since I'm booked in to take my Level 2 now, she's gonna have to wait because there's no way I'd be any good for her if we're testing on the same day! I want to do my best at being strong for her, not some gibbering wreck!!!

Nicki

[CanAmSk8ter]

LOL you guys are not alone! My mom has no problem watching me compete, but she cannot deal with tests. My dad was at a conference this summer when I was testing, and I told her she didn't have to come, but I think she felt bad that my dad was missing a test and a competition in the same weekend, so she came. First test session she's been to in five years. We took separate cars, and she showed up during my practice ice with the dog in the car! I know darn well she brought him so she would have an excuse not to be in the rink with me while I skated. When I was a teenager I would have been furious, not to mention devastated that she didn't actually want to watch, but now that I'm older I laughed it off. Unfortunately I didn't pass, so I promised her she doesn't have to come to another test until I'm taking my last Gold dance, and I really don't think she will. But that's ok, now that I'm old enough to do my own hair and makeup I think my dad's the better skating parent in a lot of ways.

[Mrs Redboots]

Originally posted by NickiT
However she's coming up to being ready to take her Level 1 test now but since I'm booked in to take my Level 2 now, she's gonna have to wait because there's no way I'd be any good for her if we're testing on the same day! I want to do my best at being strong for her, not some gibbering wreck!!!

Nicki Oh, I don't know, Nicki; we had a mother-daughter combination testing here once, and both did better from the presence of the other. In fact, when the time came for them to do their Level 2 together, Mother was off with a sprained ankle, and I'm not sure who minded more when it came to test day and, with the best will in the world, she couldn't even lace up her boots, never mind take her test!

And another friend of mine, who has tested herself to inter-Silver Dance, watched a beloved protegee test, and "propped" various men through their first tests, tell me that it is all hell, but three totally different kinds of hell!

In other words, don't totally rule out testing on the same day as your daughter - you might well inspire each other, rather than the reverse....